BQ JUST GOT BACK FROM THE ROYAL WEDDING!.........UH.....,NO, NOT THAT ONE........

             At first we thought our invitation got lost in the mail........

             Then we realized Princess Meghan must not have cared for the spec screenplay we sent her...."Marnie 2: Count The Silverware".....

              .........with our note attached: 'Don't make the same mistake Princess Grace made and pass this one up!'

               Aw well, screw the Duchess of Sussex if she can't take a joke.......we consoled ourselves about our ouster from the guest list with a viewing of  1951's "Royal Wedding"........

               .........which is, as far we know, the only movie about the wedding of the Princess's Great-Grandparents which features Fred Astaire having a romantic affair with a hat rack before he dances on the ceiling of his hotel room without the aid of any hallucinogenic drugs........

                We should have sent Harry and Meghan a copy of this film........so many life lessons to pick up on........such as.....

                 When Your Boat's In Choppy Waters, Keep Dancin'......Astaire and Jane Powell try putting on a waltz exhibition while their ocean liner hits rough seas.  Talk about a metaphor for living your life in the public eye........swirling around while the floor tilts under you, forcing you to dodge sliding furniture and people.......

                 Don't let Royalty go to your head......people only think you can walk on the ceiling cause they don't know you're standing still and someone's spinning the room........sooner or later, you'll get nasty tweets that read....."you guys can't really do that any more than the Pan Am stewardess in "2001".....

                  but we also issue the Royal newlyweds one moment of caution when watching.........

                  Pay no attention to the final big musical number, "I Left My Hat In Haiti"........if Haiti was truly populated only by singing and dancing white people, Trump would have had a golf course and a hotel there years ago......

                 Congrats to the Royals.....(and seriously, Princess.....think about "Marnie 2", we got hold of a way better looking wooden horse for you to ride in the foxhunting scenes).....for "Royal Wedding", 4 regal stars...(****)