'BEACH THRILLER'......DON'T HIT THE BEACH OR THE POOL WITHOUT THIS ONE....

  Beach Thriller by Jamie Day (2026)

     What better book to read on a beach than this one, a twist crammed mystery set in a scenic little Massachusetts coastal town..........where there's almost as many hidden dark family secrets as there are shells on the sand.

     Actually, this Jamie Day page turner can be enjoyed just as much in the Fall or the dead of winter or any time at all, but if you've gotten into previous Day thrillers like I have, you'll want to grab hold of it ASAP..

     The newest resident of Beauport Mass. is novelist Holly Sinclair, whose meager book royalties and low finances force her to move in to her family's dilapidated seaside cottage. Along with the peeling paint and sagging woodwork, the house fills Holly with painful memories of her late older sister. Holly's convinced Anna's tragic, so-called accidental death connects back to the ultra wealthy Carmichaels, the sort of Beauport royal family whom Anna worked for as a server. And Holly's certain, despite the obnoxious town cop who tells her otherwise, that Anna's death constitutes an unsolved murder and that the Carmichaels hide a whole closet full of skeletons in their castle-estate.......complete with an ominous turret tower hiding who-know-what..

     While trying to start to new novel to help her dire bank account, Holly ends up providing shelter and care for Jade, an outwardly tough but vulnerable teen girl runaway. And her worries for Jade only become worse when the girl takes a job with the dreaded Carmichaels, including the imperious matriarch Maeve and her suave son Conrad.. When the fearless Jade takes it upon herself ,on Holly's behalf, to conduct an undercover investigation into the mysterious family..........well, a reader can prepare for all manner of breathless events and stunning reveals.

     Once again, Jamie Day hits the bullseye here, and I felt there's way more heart and soul packed into these characters than I've seen in previous Day thrillers, which is all to the good.........since the suspense doubles up when you start to hear yourself muttering internally..."no, no, don't go in there!" Whatever kind of reading list you're working on......I'd recommend putting "Beach Thriller" somewhere high up on it.

     4 stars (****).

'THE BREAK-UP RETREAT......A JOURNALIST UNDERCOVER......OUT TO PUT THE BRAKES ON THE BREAK-UP THERAPIST....

The Break-Up Retreat by Camilla Sten (2026)

     If there's anything we know for sure about psychological thrillers set in remote so-called 'wellness' retreats, it's this.

     Nobody's going to get well. Somebody ( maybe multiple somebodies) are going to get dead. And you can safely bet that a spoonful of sugar won't make the therapy go down.

     Undercover journalist Isobel Anderssen hopes to pull the curtains back on the Himlafall Clinic run by world famous therapist and best selling author Dr. Martina Hastings. The 'good' doctor and her deep-in-the-Swedish-woods clinic exclusively cater to healing, improving and correcting the lives of hurting women devastated by toxic relationships that always lead to break ups.

     But Isobel suspects there's deep trouble in paradise. Ugly rumors of mistreated, abused patients and possibly even some who've mysteriously disappeared and never heard from again. Infiltrating Himlafall as a would-be patient, she hopes to find out what's going on, with the help a a dear lifelong friend who's secured a job as one the clinic's staff assistants.

     As you can imagine, nothing goes right for Isobel. Ominous clues abound, and she didn't count on the charismatic, supremely self-satisfied Dr. Martina knowing full well how to captivate and dominate her patients.....including Isobel. The therapy sessions carry an unsettling atmosphere of cruel intimidation and the dread and suspense start to escalate until all bad things come to a head.......on what else? A dark and stormy night.

     As long as the book stuck to the unfolding plot in the clinic itself, I found it briskly paced, well crafted and working up a good amount of chill inducing shivers and anticipation for whatever comes next. But then every so often author Camilla Sten goes down the psychology rabbit hole, filling up the pages with endless texts memorandums , case history blah-blah-blahs.....and it rarely does anything except bring the book's momentum to a grinding halt......practically begging a reader to skim through it. .

     But I don't want to miss pointing out the finale's a real cinematic corker, slightly flirting with all out horror. amid all the revelations. Which, come think of it, makes me want to round it up to a 3.5 rating. You'll get the feeling that Dr. Martina would've been better off recommending Haagen-Dazs and Netlfix romcoms for break-up therapy instead of her own loony ideas.

     3 & 1/2 stars (***1/2). 

'YOU WON'T FORGET ME'.....ROCK 'N ROLL AND ROMANCE.....REAL AND FAKE.....AND ON TOUR....

 You Won't Forget Me by Mazy Eddings (2026)

     This is one busy, busy book and I don't mind admitting that if one of its intentions was to make a reader fall head over heels for the lead character....then mission accomplished.

     Author Mazy Eddings packs a whole of content in here to surround the primary tale of a a rocky but always sweetly passionate sapphic romance. There's an unflinching look, both funny and dramatic at the struggles of a fledgling rock 'n roll band, trying to create their music and make themselves heard.. But that's an uphill battle fought in the pop music trenches 0f record label machinations and bookings in dingy bars and clubs. And then there's always the vast social media universe of of instant critics hovering over the every move of those who dare to live their lives in the public eye.

     This is what faces 23 year old singer songwriter Cubby Clark, whose efforts to put her feelings into meaningful words and music seem constantly derailed by the ups and downs of her rock group and her own turbulent love life. Ex band member Conner, also Cubby's ex boyfriend has moved on to an overnight smash solo career.. But it's a career built on a hit song portraying Cubby as a poor excuse for a girlfriend, both in and out of the bedroom.

     Betrayed, enraged and and deeply hurt by being cast as a pop music villainess in the media, an already anguished Cubby gives in to her label owner's plan for an American tour to feature a deliberately fake romance between Cubby and band mate Harry. This only adds all new troubles on top of Cubby's realization that her lifelong love for Darcy, fellow band member and friend since childhood, is far, far more than platonic.

     Author Mazy Eddings expertly has you literally aching for Cubby as her passion to create and her passion for Darcy collide along with her temperamental clashes with the band and Connor's insidiously false public portrayal of her.. Being young and given to spur of the moment wrong decisions, you can't help but silently cheer her on to find a way into daylight, into the music she lives to compose.......and the girl she can't live without.

     By the time 'You Won't Forget Me' finishes , you feel like you've been served a 10 course meal...... the rock music life in all its contentious, rambunctious glory, the electric joys of crafting music, the treacherous navigation through media jungles.......and finally pure overpowering love. And that's a whole lot more than I ever expected from a book with that usual familiar cover of two girls gazing dreamily at each other.

        4 stars (****).

'ROCKET'S RED GLARE'......BUT HALF THE BOOK'S NOT THERE......

  Rocket's Red Glare by James Patterson and Matt Eversmann (2026)

     I have aways loved James Patterson for his fast pacing, succinct brief chapters and compelling stories you can't stop reading. And I couldn't wait to plunge into this bullet-riddled, global terrorism action-adventure he co-wrote with Matt Eversmann. A five star rating seemed practically a done deal.

     No deal.

     Not when you plow through a breathless thrill packed book only to have it abruptly come to a dead stop, leaving multiple plot points dangling. It's equivalent to watching a rip roaring action movie where the projector breaks down halfway through. Or a similarity to those end credits teasers of superhero movies, which lead you to realize that the 2 & 1/2 hour movie you just sat through was nothing more than an extended trailer for the sequel.

     Not cool, Mr. Patterson. Not cool at all.

     Let's be clear, I have no problem with thrillers that leave a few tantalizing plot threads in their final pages, as long they play fair and offer readers a measure of closure in regard to the current story we've committed to and read.

     "Rocket's Red Glare" functions as nothing than a colossal teaser for a subsequent book....if in fact authors Patterson and Eversmann get around to publishing one.

     I'll not waste time getting into plot details , other than it follows a formidable independent Paramilitary force contracted by the U.S. government to take on a massive terrorist attack on American soil. Not an easy task, considering the amount of double-agents and moles sprinkled into the mix. As far as the book proceeds, it does deliver, in typical James Patterson fashion, non stop battles and surprises.

     But sorry, as much of a Patterson fan as I am, I'm in no way recommending this book to anybody unless it's published with the blatantly missing second half restored.

     2 stars (**). and that 's being overly kind, considering what a come-on grift this book is. 

       

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.....SPECIAL "MOTHER OF ALL RALLIES" EDITION.......

 Donald Trump announces a new line-up for his promised 'Rally of Rallies' concert for the 250 celebrations.....these include-

     *Pete Hegseth whipping 200 captured Iranian schoolgirls before forcing them into a mud pit for live free-for-all wrestling.

      *On an Imax, JumboTron, Jared Kushner and Ivanka take you on a tour of their private Albanian island with includes an exclusive spa dedicated to healing those selfless brave patriots, the Jan. 6 rioters.

        *Lee Greenwood sings while driving a pickup truck over human speed bumps created from Latino Abuelas serving time at ICE detainment centers.

      *In a thrilling Grand Finale, acting Attorney General Todd Blanche indicts and arrests the entire casts of Broadway musicals in mid-performance!

Joyous weekend to all BQ visitors, Hell On Earth to all Trumpanzees......see you next week!

'SPENCER'S MOUNTAIN'.......AMERICANA SPREAD EXTRA THICK......BUT OH THAT SCENERY.......

 Spencer's Mountain (1963)

 

     We always thought of writer-director Delmer Daves as the Wal-Mart generic version of Hollywood soap opera grandmaster Douglas Sirk (of "Imitation of Life", "Magnificent Obsession", "Written on the Wind", "All That Heaven Allows").

       Both men were partial to star-studded larger-than-life melodramas photographed in eye-dazzling, blinding Technicolor. Daves' output included such Sirk-ian potboilers like "A Summer Place", "Parrish", "Rome Adventure", and "Susan Slade" (most of them making liberal use of the Warner Brothers junior varsity young actors under studio contracts).

        Unlike the overall gentlemanly tone of Sirk's films, Daves wasn't above entertaining his audience by salting his stories with some low comedy and double entendre sexual innuendo. His crowd-pleasing instincts rarely failed him......he knew how to tug on your heartstrings and still show you a good time.... 

     'Spencer's Mountain' came from the prolific pen of novelist, screenplay and teleplay writer Earl Hamner Jr. Like much of his output, it was based on his rural Virginia upbringing amid a large extended family.

      Almost all of "Twilight Zone"s backwoods supernatural episodes came from Hamner and 'Spencer's' was heavily based on his own country life during Depression era America. 9 years after the release of Daves' film version, Hamner would strike TV gold creating the long running, heart tugging series 'The Waltons'.

         Anyone even slightly familiar with 'The Waltons can easily spot how 'Spencer's Mountain' served as its prototype in many ways.  Both films center around a large close knit family who dote on and heavily depend on their oldest son, who dreams of a life  beyond cow-milking, and co-parenting his his many younger siblings......(Hence James MacArthur's 'Clayboy' Spencer later evolves into Richard Thomas's 'John-boy' of 'The Waltons'.)

         But where 'The Walton's was designed for the small screen, 'Spencer's' unfolds in the spectacular sunshine of the Grand Teton Mountains in Wyoming. And the breathtaking landscapes are photographed with such picture postcard perfection, you might need sunglasses to watch them.

          The film also benefits from its lead performances by Henry Fonda and Maureen O'Hara as the of the Spencer parents.  Fonda has an especially fine time as the irascible but deeply loving dad to his brood, averse to church-going and given to occasional bouts of boisterous heavy drinking. 

           Armed with a script co-written by himself and Hamner, Delmer Daves drenches the film, like heavy molasses on pancakes, with unabashed sentimentality. There's choir hymns, sudden tragedy, cute toddlers, first love, painful setbacks and no end of manipulative moments designed to wring out sighs, tears and smiles from an audience that Daves and Hamner shamelessly play like a piano.

        Doubling down on the shmaltz, Max Steiner's insistent, omnipresent score pours on the swelling strings at every opportunity.

         In the dark, dark ages we live in now, of course the film comes off like a dusty museum piece, hopelessly out of date with its heart-on-its-sleeve attitudes and blatant cornball atmosphere.  With the exception of its few moments of sudden drama and tragedy, the film exhibits little forward momentum or a sense of urgency......you watch it unfold at its own leisurely, unhurried pace. 

       (Keep in mind, the film arrived in theaters still a half a year away from JFK's assassination, which would mark the beginning of the end of American innocence and confidence in its institutions. When 'Spencer's Mountain' arrived on screens, audiences could still savor and appreciate old fashioned Americana.)

        But Delmer Daves would not allow his film to end up completely Disney-fied.  Halfway through, he tosses in something of a wild card for both the film and James MacArthur's 'Clayboy'......cornfed, blonder than blonde Claris, a hormonally charged Wyoming firecracker played by Mimsy Farmer in her first major film appearance. Only minor roles followed for her until Farmer moved on to Europe where she flourished in uninhibited cult Euro-Junk and bloody, sexy Giallos.

        As for 'Spencer's Mountain', we're not sure whom we'd recommend it for.....maybe Henry Fonda/Maureen O' Hara completists, Golden Age film music curators, for the chance to wallow in a prime Steiner score,  anyone considering a vacation in Jackson Hole Wyoming or maybe lovers of antiquated Hollywood-in-the Heartland corn.....as for us, we reveled in the old school paintbox Technicolor, a glorious sight never ever seen in today's films.

         2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2).

       

           

'THE INCREDIBLE MELTING MAN'......ONE LITTLE TRIP TO SATURN ...NOW HE'S JACK THE DRIPPER.......

 The Incredible Melting Man (1977)

     If we're to believe the cult movie scuttlebutt that accumulates over the years, this ludicrous, dirt  cheap goo-fest became much treasured and beloved by fanboys everywhere. 

       True, one look at that poster could send any horror-gorehound into fits of orgasmic joy.

        That is, until you sit down and try watching it from beginning to end......

         Such a tasking feat is possible, but only if you're well lubricated with booze and come prepared to fling your own 'Mystery Science Theatre 3000' gags and insults at the screen. 

         Every expense was spared to bring this story to slow moving life......a shameless rip-off/remake of the much better 1959 "First Man Into Space". It's about an astronaut who returns to Earth coated in agonizing cosmic sludge and driven to murderous madness. 

          'Melting Man's dauntless space voyager Steve West, along with two other crew members, gaze upon the rings of Saturn......big mistake.

           Even bigger mistake due to the film's $2.98 budget - it's not Saturn they're looking at but old archive footage of solar storms......which as far as we know, only take place on the sun. 

           Steve's buddies don't make it back to Earth, but Steve does.....in a state of dripping, extra-gooey decomposition, which doesn't sit well with Steve. Growling and enraged, he chases after his poor nurse to insure she'll never be included in any sequels.......

            And now let us point out the film's ultimate raison d'etre......the startling make-up effects by one of the masters of the art, Rick Baker. ("Planet of the Apes", "An American Werewolf in London" and many many others).  He's the only genuinely talented, creative individual involved with this movie.......but that doesn't bode well for any movie that has to rely solely on one single production team member to make the resulting film watchable. 

         The rest of film's crew, writer-director William Sachs and his woeful cast of has-beens and non entities are a painful embarrassment to even talk about.

          Nobody should think they'll extract laughs aplenty from this bunch, like giggling at Ed Wood Jr. and his coterie of outcast-oddballs from  "Plan 9 From Outer Space".  The 'Melting Man' cast appears recruited from whoever agreed to kick in a few bucks to film's budget and they're no fun at all to even mock for their limited to non-existent skills. 

        Speaking of the film's low, low budget......its depiction of the U.S. space program consists entirely of that hapless nurse, two doctors and a cranky old General (Myron Healy). How this bunch managed to launch three guys to Saturn all by themselves with no apparent infrastructure anywhere in sight....well, feel free to make your own attempts to figure that out......

       But let us now move on the the actual bloody adventures of Melty, who spends most of the film's 86 minutes staggering through rural foliage, dripping goo on the vegetation and offing a few unlucky folks here and there......including one poor soul whose severed head floats lazily down a river till it tumbles down a waterfall for extra squishy goodness. 

        A teen girl, giving the worst impression of hysteria ever, does hack off Melty's hand but you can't keep an oozing man down.....before he finally succumbs to a total blubbery collapse, like a diarrhea snowman caught in a heatwave, he's succeeded in wiping out most of the supporting cast.....but then, they're really no loss to either the film or the acting community.  

        In the final ironic scenes, it's left to a perplexed elderly janitor to scoop up what's left off Drip-along, while the TV news proudly announces we're sending three more guys to the rings of Saturn!  (presumably sent there by a re-staffed NASA consisting of a nurse, doctor and General. )

         Fans of the astonishing nightmare-inducing creations of Rick Baker won't want to miss this....but for even for the most ardent of sci-fi completists, the minimal fun this movie provides is barely worth the time spent to endure it. 

           1 & 1/2 stars (*1/2).