THE 2026 ACADEMY AWARDS......NOT THE GOOD OLD DAYS, BUT SOME NOMINEES WITH PIZZAZZ HELPED A LOT.......

 The 98th annual Academy Awards Ceremony (2026)

           We'll always sigh and pine for that Golden Era when millions of us crowded into theaters to watch the most exciting and popular movies of the year.

      And we couldn't wait to see our favorite blockbusters competitively vie for the ultimate prize at the end of the rainbow.....the Oscar statuette.

       All of that began to fall apart with the onslaught of streaming services and the nominations dominated by obscure, unwatchable, audience unfriendly films that nobody cared about and nobody had the slightest interests in sitting through. 

        But some of the long gone glamour and anticipation returned this year with the addition of actual crowd-pleasing nominees that audiences enjoyed and turned out for....("One Battle After Another", "Sinners", "Weapons"...

         Surprise, surprise....even at over 3 & 1/2 hours, we were never bored and for a change, we took an active interest in who was going to win the clash of the 'One Battle' and 'Sinners' titans. 

         So here's our impressions, in no order whatsover.....

          Conan O' Brian  The "Weapons" kickoff was inspired, his subsequent bits ranged from funny to mildly amusing and his monologue, with a only a few bumps, was on target. We say bring 'im back next year by all means.

           Timothee Chalamet  Got exactly what he deserved.....nothing. His 'I'm-a-legend-in-my-own-mind' shtick finally undid him and we're not sure he learned anything from the hard lesson of not taking your ego out of a walk in public.  He's a gifted kid and we've no doubt there's more nominations in his future as his career progresses.....who knows, with a little injection of humility, he could even win one. C'mon Timmy....show you're a good sport and next appear in an IMAX mash-up of 'Swan Lake' and 'La Traviata'...

          The orchestra and its conductor   When they started playing off the 'K-Pop Demon Hunters' song winner who tried to speak, Conan should've sprayed the band a with fire extinguisher. 

          Bill Pullman and his son Lewis Pullman  Granted, it was a dumb, flop bit they wrote for you, but you should've tried to pull out of it with a little more grace and professionalism. Most painful moment of the show. 

          Choreographer Mandy Moore...a genuine MVP here, with her dynamic staging of the 'Sinners' and 'K-Pop Demon Hunters' songs...each of which stopped the show.

         Legendary songwriter Diane Warren....lost her 17th competitive Best Song nomination (but did receive a Life Achievement Oscar in 2022).  Sadly,  her expert musical craft in storytelling never connects with whatever popular film nails the Zeitgeist of the moment. But maybe....sooner or later the stars will align for her.......

       In Memoriam   We stood fully prepared to unleash our usual evisceration of the Academy's death roll, which it consistently screws up every year, both in selection and presentation. And with 2025 being a cruel, brutal year for the loss of so many beloved cinema icons, we expected the worst.

         But what a stunner.....this year the Academy finally stepped up and acknowledged that the passing of these legends required some extra special effort. Yes, there were omissions (Brigitte Bardot) but those heartfelt tributes to Rob Reiner, Robert Redford, Diane Keaton, Catherine O' Hara and Robert Duvall were, for splendid change of pace, handled with taste, care and a whole lot of heart. 

         Miss Congeniality Award:  to Elle Fanning. We didn't see anyone who looked like they enjoyed the ceremony more than Fanning, who bubbled over with happiness from the Red Carpet to the finale credit crawl. Love her to pieces.....

          "Wish I Were Somewhere Else" Award to Leonardo DiCaprio, who probably checked his watch 300 times throughout the proceedings.

            "I Actually Was Somewhere Else" Award: to sourpuss Sean Penn, who passed up a golden opportunity, as a likely Best Supporting Actor winner, to use the Oscars as a Bully Pulpit to vent about whatever's pissing him off at the moment. We don't blame the other most-likely competitor, Delroy Lindo, for scowling and sitting on his hands when the absent Penn won.   Yay to Kieren Culkin for his casual backhanded diss on Penn. 

             Best Acceptance Speeches: Both winners, Michael B. Jordon and Jessie Buckley, delivered all the emotional, heartfelt highpoints you'd expect.

             And finally....Conan, do NOT join the Christmas Adventurers Club  Perfect wrap-up as Conan spoofed Sean Penn's fate in 'One Battle After Another'......but we still need him back.....

             Overall.....a typically messy, overlong night at the Oscars....but a lively, funny, always entertaining spectacle.....with enough stuff going right to counterbalance all the gaffes, fluffs, mistakes and verbal bloopers of a live event. 

             3 and 1/2 stars (***1/2).....hooray for Hollywood.

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP......SPECIAL "DEPARTMENT OF EXCURSION" EDITION.....

Melania Trump, attempting to imitate the demented rants of her husband, declares herself a "visionary"...

But enough of her......time to go off to war!! Oops...we mean...Trump's new term for it...."excursion".....

And finally.....to all Trump voters....(both the brain-dead cultists and the "But I didn't vote for this!!" gang....particularly the ones who have loved ones actively serving in the military......

How about it, folks?  Since your Dear Leader may be putting your fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, sons, daughters, brothers and grandchildren at risk....(the Dear Leader who promised you no more foreign wars...)....how about his young, healthy, fit-for-service larva joining up too....(even if he's inherited his father's now-you-see-'em-now-you-don't bone spurs....)  

To BQ visitors:  Thank you for your kind, caring get-well messages.  We're back in action Monday with an Academy Awards  wrap-up!  Happy Weekend! 

 

'STAKEOUTS AND STROLLERS'.....A FEARLESS REPORTER TURNED FECKLESS PRIVATE EYE....UP TO HIS EARS IN DANGER AND DIAPERS....

  Stakeouts and Strollers by Rob Phillips (publishes 3/17/26)

      Be on the lookout for this mystery gem, for which BQ received an advance copy, courtesy of NetGalley and Minotaur Books/St. Martin's Publishing.

     If this is the start of a series, I'm all in for more danger, cozy childcare and dry wit with Charlie Shaw - former San Francisco wild card news reporter turned relentless, fearless but fairly reckless Private Eye.

     The brazen Charlie, with his distaste for authority and ability to stumble into peril at any given moment gets a lot more than he bargained for while surveilling a cheating wife. This seemingly simple adultery case puts him in the path of a feisty but heartbroken 16 year old girl searching for her drunken petty criminal father........and also in the path of hoodlum brothers and their hulking scary hit-goon. And all this doesn't sit well with his his loving wife, who's not crazy about Charlie sometimes taking their adorable baby daughter with him on stakeouts.

     I loved how this story is told almost entirely in rapid fire, pithy, right-to-the-point dialogue exchanges and also with plenty of humanity, heart and a whole lot of sly humor. (In many ways, it sounded inspired by the priceless back-and-forth repartee of the Robert B. Parker 'Spenser' mysteries.) And by the way, the mysteries Charlie has to unravel are top-notch as well, filled with twists among a variety of characters, some vulnerable, some nasty and some of them downright hazardous to Charlie and his family's health.

     A terrific run read from start to finish and I can't wait for Charlie's further adventures.

      5 stars (*****).

PARDON US AS BQ BRIEFLY HEADS FOR SOME MEDICAL FIX-ME-UPS.......

 Sorry we won't be with you for a few days as we're hospital bound for a bit of a quick, medical repair job......hope to back in action within a couple days time and with loads of more reviews and commentary.....

      Our doctor (seen here examining us) is a recent graduate of R.F.K.Jr's newly opened medical school and assures us nothing could go possibly wrong.....

      See you in a few!

'SCREAM 7'....LIKE SANDS IN THE HOURGLASS....THESE ARE THEY DAYS OF THEIR KNIVES...

 Scream 7 (2026)

     Over the years, we've seen our fair share of slash-a-thons and watched countless numbers of slash-test-dummies go under the knife.....(mostly horny teen boys and cheerleaders...Numbers #1 and #2 on every slasher's to-do list).

      We actually held slightly higher hopes for this one, given that Kevin Williamson,  one of the primary masterminds of the meta-snarky gag 'n gore gilled 1996 'Scream', returned to both write and direct this new entry.  (the other mastermind being the original film's director, the late Wes Craven).

         Oh well.....pardon us while we exhale a sigh of resigned disappointment. Eh-h-h-h-h-h......

         Williamson hits all the usual tropes of this series.....the high body count, the endless references to other familiar horror movies (including the 'scream' movies themselves), the big reveal as to who (or how many people) were hiding behind the Ghostface mask.

           But there's no snap, crackle or pop in any aspect of 'Scream 7'......the direction, script, performances, camera work and set design. It feels like Willliamson and everybody else down the line just phoned it in and worked from a well worn 'Scream' Movies For Dummies' paperback instruction manual. 

           As always, whoever plays Ghostface is not simply a blade-wielding psychopath, but gifted with the physical stamina of a Marvel superhero.....like the old slogan for Timex watches.....they take a lickin' and keep on tickin'. 

          For the gorehounds, the kills are more than plentiful and every so often startling......the most imaginative and grisly is reserved for the poor little manic pixie theater kid played by McKenna Grace, whose final (and fatal) performance as Tinkerbell will give Scream-o-holics what they crave. 

          And we do salute the film's use of cinema's new arch-nemesis, A.I. as an excuse to resurrect a game Matthew Lillard, having the time of his life re-playing original Scream Ghostface Stu Macher.....

           Yet the whole dreary enterprise reeks of out-of-ideas filmmakers and studio execs lining up to squeeze more cash out of an exhausted franchise. The many deaths of the cardboard archtypes parade past us with little or no meaning, emotion or importance. We could almost imagine them holding on to tickets to await their names called for their turn into the meat grinder. 

           Mainly for 'Scream' completists and determined horror fans. For everyone else, it's never any better than 1 & 1/2 stars (* 1/2)  

           Easily skipped at theaters......just wait for whatever streaming services it wanders into. 

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.......SPECIAL COMBO 'KRISTI WE HARDLY KNEW YE...AND NEVER WANTED TO' & 'ISN'T WAR FUN!' EDITIONS

 This week's tsunami of madness defies all known description....so here's a visual rundown......first, America's most notorious domestic terrorist.....found herself unemployed.

But enough about Kristi, who's off to her new make-believe post of Special Envoy to Shield of the Americas.....which we're certain is the next Disney Plus Marvel series.....

        Now....battle stations, everyone! We're off to a Forever War! (You know, the kind Trump promised you he'd never get into......

To BQ visitors: Wondrous weekend to you all!

To Trump voters: Enjoy those rising gas prices....the war's only costing you a billion a day.....no problem, right? Right? Are you there?

WANT TO KNOW HOW TRUMP'S NEW WAR ENDS? EXHIBIT A: 'BILLION DOLLAR BRAIN'.....

     Here at BQ HQ, we don't need to rely on cable news pundits to predict how Trump's spankin' new war, Operation Epstein Fury  will turn out......

      We know already from the source by which all prescient wisdom emanates......

          Movies.

     We direct your attention to Billion Dollar Brain (1967) the third theatrical film about the adventures of novelist Len Deighton's dryly witty, slightly rogue MI6 secret agent Harry Palmer......as perfectly embodied as a kind of grown-up delinquent anti-Bond by Michael Caine. 

       Britain's resident anything-goes, madman director Ken Russell ("Tommy", "Altered States", "The Music Lovers") given the film's loony, nutso plot, predictably went wild with it......and the film's climax will provide you with a telling metaphor for Trump's latest, most insane attempt to take our minds off the Epstein files.....his Middle East war, which he swore to his mouth breathing, red-hatted Trumpanzees he'd never wage.

        'Billion's Megalomaniac is mad, mad, mad Texas gazillionaire General Midwinter (played with eye-bulging, foam-at-the-mouth gusto by Ed Begley). An All-American patriot, General M deploys his private army to invade Latvia and touch off a revolution that will no doubt cause the populace to rise up and overthrow communist Russia.

       Yeah....right. 

       Driving  minion-filled tankers and armed snowmobiles across a frozen lake, Midwinter's crusade literally sinks in mid winter......when the ice cracks and he and his army go glub, glub, glub into the ice cold drink.

        (And yes, if this sounds vaguely familiar to cinema buffs, of course it's a direct homage to the iconic drowning of the Teutonic Knights in Sergei Eisenstein's medieval war epic "Alexander Nevsky".)

          Midwinter's bubble-brained ideas of instant regime change bear a striking similarity to our own homegrown would-be conqueror, Donald Trump. But while Midwinter believes fervently in his cause, Trump believes in nothing but the greater glorification  of Trump and doesn't think much past that......meaning there's no endgame or carefully laid strategy on his mind, other than the fun of watching his missiles and bombs reigning down on the Iranians......combine that with a Filet O' Fish sandwich, fries and a coke -  it's Trump's recipe for a narcissist's orgasm. 

      Midwinter's army is nothing but a horde of faceless, fictional cultists who've swallowed his bullshit while five-time draft dodger Trump now risks the very real lives of American men and women of the U.S. armed forces......brave people he privately thinks of as 'suckers and losers'.

         Our final glimpse of Midwinter practically serves as a political cartoon of Trump......trapped in a flooded glass capsule, a prisoner of his own delusions, gasping for his last breaths as the water rises over his head. 

       Tragically, we've yet to see our last glimpse of Trump, with his toddler tantrums, decaying mind and desperate fear of his inevitable exposure as a pedophile. Because he's drowning all of us in that cracked open lake and determined to take us all to the bottom with him......