'DR.CRIPPEN'......WELL ACTED, BUT CRIPPEN HAD OUR ATTENTION SLIPPIN'.......

 Dr. Crippen (1963)

       As we struggled to stay awake during this dull,  lifeless rendition of a notorious British murder case, we couldn't help daydreaming about what grisly fun Hammer Films might've had with this story. 

        Not that the team behind this film didn't assemble a game cast. The owlish, subdued Donald Pleasance made a perfectly creepy Crippen, an American homeopath doctor who practiced in England at the turn of the 20th century.

         Far outshining Pleasence as the film's MVPs were Coral Browne as Crippen's sex starved but betrayed wife Belle and the young luminous Samantha Eggar as Ethel la Neve, his mistress. 

        The biggest mystery for us was not whether Crippen intentionally or accidentally poisoned Belle, then carving up her torso for burial under the cellar floor.  (Don't get too excited.....the carve-up carnage stays strictly off-screen....)

     The biggest puzzle we grappled with throughout the film......what did either of these women, the gregarious, living-out-loud music hall singer Belle and delicate innocent Ethel possibly see in the restrained, monotone-voiced Crippen?  As capably played by Pleasence, Crippen's a gnomish, shy, personality challenged soul whom you could forget about while you're still watching him. 

          The film relies heavily on flashbacks that frequently interrupt the by-the-numbers dreary trial of Crippen, charged with Belle's murder by poison and Ethel, charged with aiding and abetting him. Coral Browne tears through her scenes with furious gusto, which went a long way in preventing us from dozing off altogether. Director Robert Lynn plows through  this story with dry-as-dust disinterest, as if he's only doing re-enactments for a documentary narration to be added later.

        What did perk us up a bit involved Crippen and Ethel attempting to flee to America via steamship, with Ethel cutely dolled up as a teenage boy. Fooling no one, they're undone in a welcome cameo appearance by that grand old Brit James Robertson Justice, playing the ship's captain who's on to them. And wouldn't ya know it, the Cap uses that brand new on board Marconi wireless radio to tip off Scotland Yard. 

        Crippen hangs, Ethel gets off and the whole deadly dull ordeal closes out after 98 long minutes.

         Maybe die hard fans of the actors and true crime enthusiasts might want take a peek, but as for BQ, we're sorry we wasted our time with it.....Hammer should've taken a shot as the good Doc.....

          1 star (*).

'CODE OF SILENCE'.......CHICAGO GANGSTERS PUMP UP THE BODY COUNT........UNTIL THEY'RE ROYALLY CHUCK'D.....

 Code of Silence (1985)

     Pardon us while we indulge in a little bit of a sentimental journey......thinking back to our freewheeling days as a movie buyer for video store inventories.....(back in the days when the newly arrived homevideo industry enacted an earth-shattering change in how people accessed their entertainment choices.)

        "Code of Silence" arrived as a huge hit for martial arts star Chuck Norris because the film opened as a major release from a prominent studio (Orion) and produced with the same kind of Class A professionalism you'd expect to see in a movie with Steve McQueen, Paul Newman or Robert Redford. 

         Norris himself counted it among his favorite films and we can easily understand why. The film elevated him out of the Cannon Films ghetto of  Grindhouse Kung Fu bonecrunchers and briefly pushed him directly into the A-List spotlight. 

         But as fate would have it, Norris returned to the Cannon lineup of action stars and his subsequent films degraded into the usual one-two-three-kick Kung Foolishness. Through the decades, he did establish himself a beloved icon among his fans, but his fling with a career filled with big movies and major stardom began and ended with of "Code of Silence".

          Originally conceived as another 'Dirty Harry' entry for Clint Eastwood, 'Code' fell to director Andrew Davis who energized this non stop carnival of carnage with stripped down no frills gritty muscularity. (Davis instantly thrived as the go-to director for high profile action hits like "The Fugitive", "Under Siege" and "Above the Law")

      Norris plays tougher-than-tough Chicago cop Sgt. Eddie Cusack. He and his team are about to bust a Latino gang's drug deal when Mafia thugs bust in with a hail of bullets and grab the drugs and money for themselves. 

        During the chaos, one of Norris's men, Cregie, an aging corrupt burnout, kills a bystander and plants a gun on his victim to clear himself.  (He's played by Chicago character actor Ralph Foody, forever immortalized as "Home Alone"s late-nite movie goon who snarls on TV,  'Keep the change, you filthy animal!')

          Cusack, disgusted with this murder of an innocent, finds himself ostracized by his fellow cops for not lying on Cregie's behalf. Which doesn't help him much with all out bloody war breaking out between the Latino and Mafia factions. Cusack finds himself becoming the lone protector of the Mafia chief's daughter Diane (Molly Hagan) who's been targeted for hostage kidnapping by ruthless Latino drug lord Camacho (the always scary cadaverous Henry Silva).

          The bodies pile up to catastrophic heights as the man-of-few words Cusack shoots, punches and swift kicks his way through a veritable army of assailants.....(and with the help of an actual remote control SWAT war machine that looks like one of Robocop's recreational vehicles.)

          The film's loaded with Chicago atmosphere and plays out on the town's real ice cold winter streets, alleys and elevated trains. Wonder of wonders, both audiences and critics embraced it equally....(a personal first for Norris). Rewatching it all these years later, we're glad to report that it still holds up as a lean mean take-no-prisoners machine.......)

            "Code of Silence" could only make us sigh and wish that it had led to Chuck Norris working with more top directors, more well crafted scripts and more major films from the big studios. But such is life in the up and down industry of filmmaking.

            It's still a 4 star (****) treat, especially for younger action fans who haven't encountered it yet. There's nothing more fun than watching evil gangbangers get a big Chuck You from the quiet but deadly Mr. Norris.  

           

'EVERYTHING HAPPENS SO MUCH'.....ESME BITES BACK AT REALITY......AND REACHES THE WORLD'S BELLY-BUTTON.....

 Everything Happens So Much by Andrew H. Murray (2026)

     Fasten your seat belts cause Oh boy here we go plunging down the multi-verse rabbit hole, from which few souls ever return with their sanity intact. But despair not......fortunately for all of us, the book's a hilarious, a mad, mad, wink-wink satire that falls somewhere between George Orwell, Jonathon Swift, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Monty Python..

I     n this fractured, warped 'Wizard of Oz/1984/Alice in Wonderland world sits our Dorothy/Alice......Esme Good. And Esme's not doing too good, the very definition of a non-entity, nondescript worker bee living a life of anonymous quiet desperation. While toiling in the customer service cubicles of a vast bureaucratic complaint department, Esme's become addicted to chugging 'Elsewheres'. It's a new designer drug that, for 15 minutes, allows her live the life of one of the millions of alternate universe Esme Goods floating around in the cosmos.

     But in somehow accidentally ripping the fabric of reality, Esme's caught the attention the omnipotent Powers-The-Be. They indict and jail her under unknowable Kafka-esque charges that sound devised by Wonderland's Red Queen.. Not to worry through, since Esme's world-shaking exploits are only just beginning......she's broken out of prison by fellow inmates Chip Sestina and, his sentient artificial talking leg Jessica.....(we're serious here.) Following along on their Oz-ian misadventures is Esme's former co-worker, impromptu attorney and possible romantic interest Talmeck. With the Fabric of Reality police hot on their heels, this nutty group goes on the run into ever more loony perilous adventures.

     No question about it.....author Andrew H. Murray is one wickedly funny social satirist who keeps you smiling and laughing all the way through this fantastic junket leading right up to the veritable belly-button of Planet Earth......(not kidding here, either). My only quibble - at times the screwball humor of it all gets lost in the the story's deepening metaphysical verbiage.......as if the book can't get out of its own way. But then I could always count on some razor sharp witty zinger coming just around the corner.....

     Anyone who loves traveling way off the beaten path and have a fun time doing it......Esme Good is good to go.

     4 stars (****).

 

'UNTIL THE LAST LIGHT GOES OUT'....FOR THIS SENIOR CLASS (AND LATER, THEIR KIDS), CHECKOUT TIME IS.......NEVER.

  Until the Last Light Goes Out by Courtney Gould (2026)

     YA horror readers should prepare themselves for an immersive deep dive here. We're talking about two separate generations trapped in the same deeply haunted, cursed resort parked on one of the remote Florida Keys. Mass mysterious deaths decimated a 2001 graduating class who'd hoped to party hearty there, but leaving only five survivors. Now, 25 years later, some of these survivors' children find themselves drawn to the abandoned resort in the hopes of finding answers their shaken parents won't dare to speak aloud... Whatever horrific, murderous presence that infested the hotel all those years ago is very much alive......and hungry, craving fresh blood from fresh victims.

     In the book's two side by side timelines, we see the growing terror unfold for the 2001 class and then repeating for the small current group. The same powerful entity uses the Kaleidoscope Key resort as a nothing more than a bait trap for humans snared in its clutches. And its abilities to bend and warp the architecture of the hotel to its own murderous ends can drive its victims into violent madness. Exits disappear, replaced by a never ending maze of corridors and rooms that only lead to........more empty corridors and rooms......and a pool seemingly custom made for drowning in.

     The ordeal of the 2026 group especially weighs heavily on estranged former best friends Paige and KJ. (Even more hurtful since the two girls nursed more that just friendly feelings toward each other.) And it's here where author Courtney Gould excels in creating characters we care about, whom we fear for, and make us cringe for them as the Kaleidoscope monstrosity, with its overwhelming God-like powers, sadistically torments and toys with them.

     I should give fair warning that with its dual timelines of two groups subjected to the same terrifying occurrences, "Until the Last Light" becomes as much of a punishing ordeal for us as it does for all these hapless young adults trapped literally in the belly of a beast. I can't deny there were moments when I felt the book threatened to simply wear me out. But if you're willing to stay on board for the full ride, there's much genuine heartbreaking emotion and human insight on display here in addition to the expected grisly splatter.

     And like all unforgettable horror novels, the final words spin the chill meter up to the raise-the-hair-on-the-back-of-your-neck setting. So by all means, check in to the Kaleidoscope hotel real soon......for the same kind of relaxing vacation you'd get at the Bates Motel or.....what's the name of that place up in New England called again? Oh right....Hill House.

     4 stars (****).

WEEKEND GLADNESS WRAP-UP.......SPECIAL SURFING THE BLUE WAVE EDITION......

 

BQ visitors:  Hoping a great weekend is in store for you all.....see you next week!

Trumpanzees:  Try to at least understand why an overwhelming majority of the country delivered an enormous 'Go F*** Yourself' to your Marmalade Mussolini.  Sorry, but there appears to be a new MAGA movement sweeping the land.....Make Assholes Go Away......

'THE ENTITY'........A GHOSTLY RAPIST SETTLES ON ONE VICTIM.......

 The Entity (1982)

       Quite some time we'd been chasing after this one for a re-watch but found it constantly elusive to get ahold of.....until, wonder of wonders, it popped up in the Amazon Prime lineup.

       And like many of the rediscovered horror movies of the 1980's, it still packs a hell of a punch, brimming with jump scares, constant dread, skilled performances and even some all-out special effects spectacle.

         Unlike Steven Spielberg and Tobe Hooper's 'Poltergeist', released the same year, 'The Entity's not designed to give you a popcorn-munchin' chuckles 'n chills rollercoaster thrill ride.

         This movie traffics in pure unadulterated terror and unease......it's not interested in showing you a good time. Just a frightening one...

          Inspired by a true 1974 paranormal case history, it's a hellish tale of lower middle class working mom Carla Moran (Barbara Hershey, superb in the role....)

           Carla's ill-fated marriage and other random hook-ups have given her a teenage son Billy (David Labiosa) and two small daughters. One night, an invisible presence slaps her and subjects her to a brutal sexual assault. 

           And it's only the beginning of subsequent, increasingly violent rapes, often accompanied by poltergeist-ish breakage of windows and furniture. Whatever this ghastly thing is, it's filled with rage....and foreplay is not its forte. Possibly a stand in metaphor for all the abusive, defective men in Carla's checkered past.

           Increasingly panicked and distraught, Carla turns for help from best friend Cindy (Margaret Blye) and then psychiatrist Dr. Sneiderman (Ron Silver).  As Sneiderman becomes deeply concerned and worried over Carla's torments, he staunchly rejects any paranormal theories as rubbish and fakery. He's convinced that Carla's attacks are self inflicted manifestations of her dark, troubled childhood, including molestations as a child. 

        In desperation, Carla turns to a parapsychology team, who've viewed enough of  the entity's sudden, explosive rampages to believe her. And to Sneiderman's outrage and worry, Carla allows the ghost hunters to use her as bait in an elaborate booby trap to freeze the transparent demon in a cascade of liquid helium. 

         Director Sidney J. Furie ("The Ipcress Files", "Lady Sings the Blues", "The Appaloosa"), gives the movie the propulsive immediacy it needs. He's more than aided in putting the horror of it all across by his MVP Barbary Hershey (of so many unsung, under-appreciated performances in films like "Black Swan", "Last Summer", "Boxcar Bertha", "The Right Stuff", "The Natural" and "The Last Temptation of Christ").

           Hershey combines the heart rending vulnerability of her character with an ingrained core of steel that's startling when it comes out of her.....(after the repeated assaults, she dares to provoke the entity with contemptuous disdain.). The film's last encounter between Carla and her unseen predator leaves an audience with a sardonic close-out and maybe, just maybe a slight bit of hope.

          We don't want to forget finishing up this  review without mentioning composer Charles Bernstein's most adept help in driving up the scare quotient.......scoring the horrific assaults with relentless, pounding percussion, a real soundtrack of nightmares.

            All horror movie completists should seek this one out if you haven't done so already. If you need more shivers and chills for chilly nights, "The Entity" remains at your service.

           4 & 1/2 stars (****1/2).

    

  

         

             

MIDWEEK GLADNESS WRAP-UP..... ........BREAKING NEWS......U.S.A. SAVED.