'LOVE LIES BLEEDING'.......ALONG WITH A FEW OTHER PEOPLE..........

 Love Lies Bleeding (2024)

      We fully expected to hate this film with a passion since it checks off all our negative boxes....

        First reason:  Its debut, of course, came with its inclusion in last year's Sundance Film Festival line-up. Which meant it was tailor made to beg for accolades from Sundance Culture Vultures and loaded up with artsy-fartsy camerawork, a skimpy script and fronted by a cast of future stars, wannbe-but-never-will strivers and even a genuine superstar or two, still craving high art credibility. 

         This film, even though it checked all those boxes that foretold a miserable time for us, turned out to be a crazy delight........believe or not, fronted by one of BQ's least favorite actors, that colossally overrated Mistress of Mope, Kristen Stewart.

         We're back in the washed out, washed up arid deserts of 1989 New Mexico, where disgusted, bored-out-of-her-gourd gym manager Lou (Stewart) ekes out a tacky living. She runs the place for its owner, her father Lou Sr.  the murderous gun-running local kingpin (a swell reptilian turn by Ed Harris). In addition to cleaning out shit-clogged toilets, she struggles to control her rage at brother-in-law J.J.(Dave Franco) who physically abuses his wife Beth (Jena Malone), Lou's sister.  Also hanging around the gym is resident airhead Daisy (Anna Barishnikov), who's got the hots for Lou, much to Lou's disinterest.  

       Into this already volatile mix arrives job seeker Jackie (Katy O' Brian) a bisexual bodybuilder on her way to Las Vegas to competitively flex her pecs. Lou, besotted by Jackie, hooks her up with free steroids and Jackie, equally hot and bothered, hooks up with Lou.....and a heaving heavy romance is born.

      But melodrama erupts and disrupts our sweaty, meaty lovers.  So agog with Lou,  Jackie brutally slaughters J.J. for putting Beth in the hospital and Lou seizes the chance to pin the murder on Lou Sr.....who, as you could guess, doesn't take kindly to the idea.

       More twists and reversals-of-fortune play out, more people end up dead and co-writer and director Rose Glass tosses in some dazzling, what-the-actual-f*** Fellini-like fantastic imagery.......(involving Jackie's steroid consumption  literally adding some Hulk to her bulk.....)  

         We can't rationalize why this loopy-doopy overheated mess tickled us. It just did. Stewart and O' Brian generate pulp friction together and even with limited screen time, Harris makes his sinister presence ooze through the entire film. 'Love Lies Bleeding' surely promised down  'n dirty 'n demented fun....and delivered.

        Before the rise of dvds and blu-rays, we would've predicted a great future for this film at midnight screenings. Oh well......you can always wait til midnight to stream it.....as SNL's Franz and Hans use to say.....it'll pump.....you up!

        3 & 1/2 stars (***1/2) 

          

'IMPOSTER'.......A VICIOUS KILLER IN A LITTLE IRISH TOWN......

  Imposter by L.J. Ross (2026)

     (I extend my thanks to NetGalley and Poisoned Pen Press/Sourcebooks for the ARC of "Imposter" in exchange for an honest review.)

     Though I've admitted I'm not a constant reader of procedural whodunits, this one grabbed my attention right away. Mainly because, I'm always all in for psychological profiling mysteries and 'Imposter' introduces a worthy new sleuth in Dr.. Alexander Gregory.. He's a forensic psychologist who also volunteers his skills as a profiler when called upon. And the new case he's involved himself with is a doozy.......a heinous, bizarre murder that's rocked and shocked the community of a little village nestled on the Irish countryside.

     Dr. Gregory arrives in the town of Ballyfinny greeted by Mayor Maggie Byrne, who's also the mother of the area's law enforcement officers of the Garda, her sons Niall and Connor. And Maggie's boys, especially Niall seem wary of Gregory when he theorizes the perverse killer is no outsider, but most likely someone who lives in the town, possibly a friend and neighbor known to everyone.........and adept at hiding their psychotic, homicidal impulses.

     As Gregory works his way through the case, he finds a sparse amount of clues but a host of local suspects who have no concrete alibi for the timeframe of the murder......and that includes Niall and Connor. Byrne. What's even worse, the killer whom everybody says hello to ever day may already be targeting their next victim.

     I loved the tight knit little population of Ballyfinny and the mounting sense of unease sometimes accomplished by a brief creepy chapter from the unidentified killer's point of view. I tried to make my own best guess out of those those prime suspects, but then author L.J. Ross served up a proper stunner of a final reveal.

     A terrific start for a new mystery series and at times even leavened with some welcome moments of gentle, understated humor.. Here's one reader who may not consume a whole lot procedurals but will definitely be on the lookout for Dr. Gregory's next case.

     4 stars(****).

'LITTLE ONE'.....A SURVIVOR RECALLS HER FATHER'S BIZARRE, CRUEL CULT.....(*****)

 Little One by Olivia Muenter (2026)

     (My thanks to NetGalley and Little, Brown and Company/Hachette Book Group for an advanced read of "Little One" in exchange for an honest review..)

     Can't say enough about how this book grabbed hold of me and kept me intrigued and enthralled right to the crushing revelations of its last few chapters. What can I say other than it's everything you want in an up-all-night page turner........characters and storyline that hook a reader from the beginning and radiate a constant feeling of 'I can't wait to stop what I'm doing right now so I can get back this book."

     At its core, 'Little One' concentrates on a toxic, dangerous cult and its charismatic, seemingly a wise fatherly founder and leader........who in reality is a monstrous individual who leaves shattered lives and death in his wake.

     Among those victims (and survivors) is Catherine West ,who's built a new life for herself as an adult, after a childhood and adolescence on a communal 'back-to-nature-live-off-the-land' farm established by her father in steamy central Florida.. Her memories of the farm run the gamut from dreamy Garden-of-Eden romps through ripened fields to the sometime capricious cruel and, dictatorial methods of her father,, whose teachings and ideals Catherine tried to faithfully follow. During that time, she'd forged a loving, sisterly bond with Linna. another child of one the farm members. And Linna's sharp intelligence always saw right through the false fatherly benevolence of Catherine's magnetic father, but neither she nor Catherine could imagine the full extent of his evil.

     In the here and how, Catherine's past and identity has been discovered by Reese, a journalist who's seeking to tell the full story of her past, her father and his farm. And that would mean uncovering whatever became of him and those who fell into his grasp......including Linna. whom Catherine has not laid eyes on since they were seventeen and whom she achingly pines for still.

     As 'Little One' shifts back and forth between Catherine's past and present, the book slowly but relentlessly pieces together the twisted tale of life on that Florida agrarian 'paradise and the parts that Catherine, Linna and others played in it. It's story filled with ever growing dread, heartbreak, tragedy and finally some horrific surprises. But author Olivia Muenter finds a way to finish with a particular endearing moment that's bound to leave you pondering and no doubt touch off endless book club discussions.

     I didn't know what to expect with this book which is why I'm happy to describe it as one of those 'can't put it down' reads that everybody searches for. With this one, mission accomplished.

      5 stars (*****).

'WOLF HOUR'.....NORDIC NOIR TRAVELS TO MINNEAPOLIS....AND IT'S JUST AS CHILLING.....

  Wolf Hour by Jo Nesbo (2026)

     (Let me first thank NetGalley and Borzoi Books/Alfred A. Knopf for an advance copy of "Wolf Hour" in exchange for an honest review.....)

     Jo Nesbo, one of the prime practitioners of Nordic Noir, heads over to our shores in Minneapolis and finds just as much murder, human strife, dark secrets, broken souls and a staggering twist to top it all off.

     In 2016, detective Bob Oz is on the trail of serial sniper whose movements, methods and choices of victims remain a confounding puzzle. Bob in the great tradition of urban detectives everywhere, suffers from a broken marriage, alc0holism, severe fits of rage and haunting memories of an almost indescribable past tragedy. But still he doggedly hunts down the suspected sniper known to be the brutal elusive Tomas Gomez, whose bloodthirsty mania as the Cartel enforcer/assassin called Lobo was legendary.

     Bob's path to Lobo isn't made any easier by his crumbling personal life and his ability to aggravate his fellow detectives and superiors. Yet he still manages to strike up some back-and-forth byplay with a woman bartender and forges an odd sort of friendship with a lonely taxidermist who actually encountered the suspect as a potential customer.

     Author' Nesbo's pacing and plotting become somewhat choppy here, as the story throws in a 2022 timeline involving a visiting Norwegian crime writer seeking to assemble the pieces of the Lobo murders together.........for his own reasons. But rest assured, everything does come together with a triple whammer of a twist, a thrilling finish and a satisfying, emotionally touching wrap-up. . This book takes the time to plunge a reader into a deep dive through the heartache and pain of its characters.

     I'd highly recommend 'Wolf Hour' even to those who don't normally include police procedurals in their favored choices. This one's special and kept me in its grip to the last page.

     4 stars (****).

'CROSS AND SAMPSON'.....PATTERSON'S DYNAMIC DUO ONCE AGAIN IN THE THICK OF IT.....

 Cross and Sampson by James Patterson and Brian Sitts (due on Feb. 9th, 2026) 

           Sandy Quill extends great thanks to NetGalley and Little Brown and Company/Hachette Book group for the opportunity of giving me an advanced read of this one.....

 
     Welcome back, dear old friends of the Alex Cross world. I can always depend on Alex and and his lifelong friend detective John Sampson to deliver another breathless thrill ride, another book that draws me into it so fully, that it takes me less than a day to finish. And in the midst of all the suspense, twists and dangerous threats, there'll be plenty of warm hearted emotional moments with the beloved Cross matriarch Nana Mama. looking over Alex and the entire family with plenty of food, love and common sense.

     This new book sends Alex and John on separate perilous investigations. For Alex it couldn't be any more deeply personal - the hunt for his college student son Damon, who has disappeared from the campus. At the same time, John has joined a Federal task force to track down a serial terrorist bomber who's left innocent victims dead and severely injured with explosives set off all around the D.C. area.

     And once again author James Patterson and co-author Brian Sitts keep a reader glued to their book with those famously swift, brief chapters that leave you with that, "Oh, I can't stop now, I've got to do the next chapter..." feeling. As usual, that feeling remains until you realize you've finished the book faster than anything else you've read this year.

     What's more to say? Other than that this one should go on every thriller reader's Not-To-Be Missed list for this year......though I doubt I even need to say that to anyone else who's already into the Cross books. (Anyone who isn't yet.....take heed.)

     5 stars (*****)

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP....SPECIAL "IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD TRUMP" EDITION....

       With this week's events of escalating horror, it's easy to see why the Saturday Night Live 'cold open' becomes less funny and tiresome every week......

      The SNL writers simply cannot match the actual craziness of Trump and his goons. For sheer lunacy and fantasy, he's far exceeded any attempts to ridicule him and his limitless ever growing heights of evil and absurdity. He's turned the entire country into one colossal SNL skit that we're all stuck in as helpless supporting players. 

       A peaceful, healthy, benevolent weekend to one and all....

BQ EXCLUSIVE!! WE INTERVIEW MELANIA TRUMP ON THE EVE OF HER MOVIE'S RELEASE TO THEATERS NATIONWIDE!

 

BQ:  Mrs. First Lady, welcome to the Beached Quill.

M:  Bored to be here, as I am everywhere. This is Newsmax, no?

BQ: Uh...no...Madame FLOTUS, this is our blog site.

M: I don't care....do you?

BQ:  Ah yes...from your infamous jacket. So, your movie, a documentary of your life, opens tomorrow and the response across the country and the world has been filled with-

M: Enthusiasm, I know. Donald told me.

BQ: Actually....more like disgust, revulsion, nausea....and most frequently.... laughter.

M:  This is fake news. People tell me they show sneak preview on crowded plane......and only 150 people asked for parachutes. Some couldn't wait a minute and just threw themselves out of the plane. A few others watched,   with little paper bags in laps.

BQ: In some theaters, only one ticket was pre-sold. How do you account for this lack of advance sales?

M:  Is bad mistake in marketing. They should not have run the ads that say, "Almost as much fun as Joker: Folie a Deux'" and "Only your last root canal can equal it in excitement".

BQ: Yes, I can see how those slogans might discourage people. 

M: People lining up as we speak. You know we get most excellent director Brett Ratboy, man who gave you Rush Hour movies. He very good with those of us who speak broken English. He said I make Jackie Chan sound like Anthony Hopkins. 

BQ: Are you aware that Brett Ratner's been credibly accused of multiple sexual assaults? And that his name pops up on the Epstein files?

M: Brit Rattrap, he good boy, never lay greasy finger on the Melania. Donald force his Paramount minions to let him make Rush Hour 4. And he also attached to direct me as 'Natasha' in new movie based on Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoon. But no Boris in it to clutter things up.....just me, the Melania as Natasha, chasing moose and squirrel. Much fun for whole family and Pornhub users.

BQ: Personally and I think I speak for millions, we can't wait to miss it. 

M:  Is your loss. Already pre-sold tickets to Barron, Don Jr. and Eric. Ivanka too busy, she say she needs time to count her eyelashes. 

BQ: I understand the premiere of the film will be mostly attended by D-list celebrities.

M: Not true. Fake news. We have top superstars coming, Scott Baio, Kid Rock, the entire next cast of 'Dancing With Stars' and Kyle Rittenhouse will fire off celebration burst of bullets from AR-15 over audience heads. On request, popcorn will be covered with molten gold. Steve Bannon be there, but we provide Hazmat suits for anyone who sits next to him.

BQ: Fascinating. Did you know that two thirds of the crew who worked on your film asked that their names be taken off the credits? Why do you suppose they did that?

M:  Is not the Melania's fault. Amazon Jeff Bezos trick them into working on movie. He tell them it was origin story of the new Bond movie villainess, played by me... Pussy The Bore. Told  them movie called The Spy Who Bought Me....with Donald as new Bond. 

BQ: That sounds too ridiculous for words.

M:  Is currently sitting in development hell....also fitting name for my years of marriage to Donald. 

BQ:  Well, Melania, thanks for making time from your busy schedule to stop in and talk. But we can't say we're looking forward to your movie. 

M: No offence taken. Neither is anyone else with ounce of sanity and common sense. Here, let me give you official 'Melania' movie gift basket. 

BQ: Wow, very generous of you. What a nice large tote bag. What's in it?

M: Much goodies. First, 200,000 free tickets to Melania the Movie. Please hand out to friends and neighbors. I beg of you. Also, your own knockoff of  infamous Melania inauguration hat, also doubles as Frisbee and weapon, since brim is sharp steel razor. Be first person on your block to behead random child or Amazon delivery man.

BQ: One last question, since Amazon laid out 40 million dollars to produce the film, can we expect to see it on Prime any day now?

M: Jeff the Bezos tell me they will insert chunks of my movie into episodes of 'Fallout', so you will think it's just another part of nuclear war aftermath.

BQ: Clever move. What's that you're handing me? Wait....is that one half of a 1000 dollar bill?

M: Is all yours. You get other half of bill when you show the Melania a ticket stub you bought from seeing my movie. Fair deal, no? Same deal I make to everyone I meet. 

BQ: In all honesty, First Lady, I think I'd rather have white hot needles driven into my eyes than sit through your film. 

M: Is so funny.....that's what everybody tell me. Even Donald. 

BQ: Good night and bad luck on the film!