ANDREW LLOYD NEVER......."LOVE NEVER DIES' & "BY JEEVIES".....

           We don't want to sound ungrateful and unappreciative........about all the free entertainment unleashed to make our social-distanced, home-sheltered, forced-house-arrest lives more tolerable in the age of Coronavirus........

             Thin includes the mighty Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber letting us watch full length videos of his musicals on 'The Show Must Go On' Youtube channel......like "Phantom Of The Opera" and "Jesus Christ Superstar"........

              But please, Sir Webby........you don't have to clean out your attic and also display your most disastrous efforts........the shows that bombed on impact and that you spent decades revising, re-writing and re-staging.......to no avail.

                 "Love Never Dies", which we never heard of until we suffered through it, was the sequel to "The Phantom Of The Opera" that absolutely no one wanted or needed.......

                  This bizarre followup has the Phantom exiled to New York's Cony Island, where's he's running some kind of grotesque sideshow populated by what looks like the entire cast of 'Fellini Satyricon'.......

                    We'll go no further with the plot.......there isn't a single memorable melody in the entire pseudo-operatic score and the whole thing's a punishment to watch......

                      We only punished ourselves for about a half an hour into "By Jeeves",  Webber's musicalization of P.G. Wodehouse's 'Jeeves' stories about hapless Brit Bertie Wooster and his ever-efficient butler Jeeves.......(cue audible groan)

                   It's performed as a show with a show....taking place (we think) in a a church basement with over-caffienated  actors racing around the stage spewing vast amounts on incomprehensible dialogue........some of which, we guess, is supposed to be funny.

                    Every so often, just to break the monotony, something resembling a song breaks out......with the accent on 'resembling'.........

                    After 30 minutes, we surrendered with hands up.......and left quietly. The show did go on for at least another 2 hours.

                   But mercifully, not with us watching. 1/2 a star for "Love Never Dies"........as for "By Jeeves", who knows?    We've heard of 'attic treasures', but these two shows belonged back up there, safely collecting dust......