'GIALLO!' TO YOU SLAB-HAPPY FANS........BQ DISSECTS "AUTOPSY".......

Autopsy (1975)    Gather 'round, fellow bloodthirsty geeks.........and let's peel the skin off this pipin' hot dish of Giallo spaghetti, doused liberally with red sauce........

               It's a tossup as to which of the two main attractions of this movie command the most attention.......

               First and foremost..........loads of freshly mutilated corpses........dangling eyeballs, shredded innards, ripped apart flesh...........and all this long, long before American TV shows discovered the joys of gruesome forensic science........

               Secondly, the bad-audition level acting and frequently exposed breasts of American expatriate starlet Mimsy Farmer.........whose attempts at emoting out hysteria and fear look more like she's experiencing severe indigestion.........

                Mimsy's a pathologist here, which gives the movie a grand excuse to lay out a stellar, cast of ghastly corpses..........(and sometimes, in Mimsy's addled mind, they don't remain inert......hoo-ha!)

                 True to Giallo tropes, Mimsy and everyone in her orbit are an annoying bunch of obnoxious, screwed up people.........so nobody minds when they start dying in horrible ways........(a proper Giallo audience should be salivating from one murder to the other......)

               But a bonus:   whenever these dopes get into furious lethal fights with each other, they're given to shouting out "I'll kill you! I'll kill you! I'll kill you!".........hey, that's the spirit, gang!

                Further upping the weirdness factor.......the movie throws in random shots of solar flares to imply that sunspots are driving half the population of Rome into messy suicides........

                .........therefore the movie becomes the first Giallo to finger a burned-up heavenly body as a major suspect.

                 And by heavenly body, I don't mean Mimsy, who loses her clothes, along with her mind while stalked and harassed by another loopy character, a disgraced race car driver turned Catholic priest...........(which gave me a brainstorm about writing a script about hordes of disgraced priests who become race car drivers.......)

                    SPOILER ALERT........you'll be happy to know.......the Sun didn't do it.....so everyone can go back to tanning. The murdering psycho turns out to be just another human douchebag in the supporting cast.....

                     Disappointing, though.......especially for a Giallo: the death handed out to the culprit equals, but doesn't exceed the ones already suffered by the victims.  Bummer.

                   Creepy and strange, but for that rather lame villain comeuppance, only two quarts of blood....(**)  As for poor Mimsy, unlike other vacant-eyed Giallo babes, she does work herself to the very limits of her very limited range.......if nothing else, by far the blondest American girl who ever wandered into Euro-trash movies.......