Trump immediately starts selling T-shirts of his Georgia mugshot with the slogan, 'Never Surrender" In related news, the photo was reproduced poster-size for a Gastroenterologist's office...with the slogan "AREN'T YOU SORRY YOU DIDN'T TAKE YOUR METAMUCIL YESTERDAY?" Reportedly, Mattel designers have copied the photo as a guide to designing their new play figure for Barbie....the box reading SENIOR KEN....RIGHT AFTER HE SAW THE MOVIE.
Trump skips the first GOP debate, though 6 our of 8 of the debaters raise their hands 'Yes" when asked if they'll support him for President if he's convicted on any of his 91 charges. But to be on the safe side, Mike Pence purchased a stainless steel neck collar.....to prevent any any injury from attempted hangings by Trump supporters. Nikki Haley promised that if Trump appoints her his Secretary Of State, she'll set up her office in an adjoining cell......
In a new donation ploy, Donald Trump offers supporters autographed bottles of his new beverage. Trump Kool-Aid, available only in Orange flavor, for $498.99 per each 12 oz. size. ...later Trump tweeted,
"No truth whatsoever about me putting cyanide in each bottle. Fake News! There's only pure organic flavoring, citrus coloring just like my head.....and little bit of Valium and Nighttime Nquil to keep you nicely doped-up and happy...
8 GOP Presidential candidates jabber away at each other in debate, most of whom pray that Trump will consider them for Vice President.......all of the candidates promised to consider taking the new pledge to support live televised whippings of pregnant women who try escaping to blue states for abortions.
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