And we mean that literally. At the utterly bonkers climax of this film, the Syd-meister lets rip what must be several sustained minutes of tonsil-warping shrieks that could telekinetically break glass.....
Who can blame her.......she's a nun in the final, agonized throes of labor, on the verge of delivering......baby Jesus? The Anti-Christ? Another Donald Trump? (no wait.....we already said The Anti-Christ, didn't we?)
What's that, you ask? A nun in labor? How can that be? Aren't they only supposed to serve as virginal 'brides of Christ'? In the...uh...metaphorical sense, right?
And didn't the convent doctor give Syd-o-licious a pop quiz pelvic to make sure her hymen was never humped? Did he grade on a curve, or what?
Welcome back to the World of Catholicism Horror, filled to the brim with creepy nuns, crazy nuns tortured nuns, half naked nuns, bathed nuns.....and pregger nuns....
Such a fate mysteriously befalls the virginal Sister Cecilia (Sweeney) as she checks in to a convent that cares for retired, elderly sisters. (Which means there no shortage of scary looking old nuns to jump-scare Sydney at a moment's notice.....)
Speaking of jump scares, there's plenty in store since the movie needs to kill time for about half its 89 minute length before its central premise kicks in......
So don't be alarmed if you think you've actually stumbled into re-watching 'The Last Omen' whose trappings are almost a duplicate of 'The Immaculate'.....
Yes, there's diabolical, behind-the-scenes doings amongst the Church hierarchy here, but for once, not in service of Satan.....
This time, the God Squad's out to stage manage the Second Coming themselves......and who better to incubate mini-Jesus than smokin' hot Sydney.
And then the real fun begins,with the film sloshing around enough blood 'n gore to make us recall the 1970's Golden Age of 'Giallo'......when Dario Argento and lesser, fellow Italian shlock-meisters freely smeared and splashed their movies with more steamy guts than a pork slaughterhouse.
But let's get back to poor ready-to-pop Sydney, whose Third Trimester from Hell provides the movie with its most nuttiest, out-of-control moments.....
Gorehouds will no doubt groan in disappointment at the filmmakers' choices for a final shot.......but others may view the film's outrageous conclusion with jubilant glee......
.......it's Sydney's Sister Cecilia, after all, who gets in the last word......a triumphant blow to the Catholic Patriarchy, which like our own American GOP, and Donald Trump, strives to keep an iron grip on every woman's crotch.
For those horror fans who love to wallow in this peculiar sub-genre, consider yourselves blessed with this one....3 stars (***).
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