'NOT WITH MY WIFE YOU DON'T!'........THE SEX COMEDY IN DECLINE.......

Not With My Wife You Don't! (1967).........could be considered the beginning of the end of that standard Hollywood staple, the glossy, faux-sexy romantic comedy.

              As the 1960's moved to the end of the decade, these films already showed signs of age, of being out of touch with the turbulent times.......along with the equally aging stars who regularly performed in them......

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                Tony Curtis still poured on the boyish charm, even though you can see he's no boy anymore. And at two exhausting, tedious hours, his charm's one of the few things this movie has going for it......

                The only other reason to endure this:   the way, way out there casting of the ever intense George C. Scott as Curtis's rival for the Italian bombshell Virna Lisi.

 

                  The oddness of Scott's casting didn't come from seeing one of filmdom's most powerful dramatic actors cavorting in an inconsequential, Technicolored assembly line farce.......(similar to Marlon Brando popping up in 1964's 'Bedtime Story').  

                   After all, Scott already proved himself a more than capable farceur in "Dr. Strangelove" and later in '67, he'd caper and clown around in 'The Flim Flam Man'......

                    But those two mentioned comedies, each in their own way, served as unique showcases for Scott's comedy chops. 'Not With My Wife You  Don't!' however, seems like a colossal waste of his time and talent.  It's like watching Sir Laurence Olivier show up in a Doris Day movie........

                 The major problem here is the movie stays  monumentally unfunny in both its premise and its execution. Obnoxious characters behave badly, but you'll find no joy in it. And you won't hear a genuinely funny line in the entire 2 hours, just desperate attempts at sarcasm. 

                  Curtis and Scott play buddy-buddy Korean war jet pilots. When not shooting down MIGs, they're relentless skirt chasers and determined rivals for whatever woman they've both set their sights on. They'll try any elaborate ruse or practical joke to one up each other during their horny hunting seasons.

                   Into Curtis's life comes the  hubba-hubba, hot tempered nurse Julietta (Lisi) whom Curtis desperately tries to keep out of Scott's lascivious clutches. But once Scott casts a lusty eye on her, the game's afoot and boys' neverending bag-the-babe contest is on......

                  When Scott's jet is shot down, Curtis takes that opportunity to woo and marry Lisi, keeping the news of Scott's survival and rescue away from her.

                   Naturally Scott return to the sexual fray and  regardless of his pal's marital status, launches an all out campaign to win Lisi for himself.......

                    The humor in all this supposedly emanates from the two guys' increasingly hysteria-fueled attempts to lay claim on Lisi.  Trust us on this......none it's the slightest bit funny. Ever.  

                   There's a small amount of pleasure in watching George C. Scott fully ham it up through all the laborious proceedings, but we can't honestly say it makes the film worth watching.......except to hardcore enthusiasts of 1960's films like ourselves.  So judge accordingly......

                   For us, we'll pop it back into the 60's time capsule and most likely won't waste any more precious time with it again........1 star (*).  Virna Lisa does look swell, though.

                   

'SOYLENT GREEN'.........IN 2022, YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT......

Soylent Green (1973)     Depending on your mood or point of view, the due date for this seminal sci-fi movie's apocalypse is either hilarious or horrifying........

                 This particular dystopian nightmare  - rampant overpopulation, total exhaustion of earth's natural resources, an atmosphere decimated by man made pollution - takes place in the year 2022.......

                  Yes, you heard that right........about 18 months from now.

                  So the filmmakers were only off by about a year and a half in predicting a world in which we're all screwed.

                  Then again, they couldn't possibly predict a world terribly afflicted  by two simultaneous plagues......Covid-19 and Donald Trump.

                   Amazingly, much of this film, cheaply made by MGM as the very last movie shot on their back lot, has the look of what we see on the news every night. 

                  Crowds of angry people wearing masks amid visibly toxic air?  Check. 

                   Mass quantities of homeless folk sleeping in shelters or huddled in massive bunches  around the streets? Check.

                   Thousands of bodies piling up?  Check.

                  Deadly divide between society's Haves and Have-Nots?  Check.

                  Objectified woman, treated as sex toys and accessories?  Check.

                   As far as we can tell, the only prediction from this movie that hasn't befallen us already is its central, horrific premise........the gruesome twist finally revealed in the film's last few scenes.

                   (If by any chance this movie and its story are still unknown to you, bow out now cause there's a GIGANTIC, BIG-ASS SPOILER ahead.......although we can't imagine you haven't heard the film's legendary dialogue declaration used as a pop culture punchline at one time or another......)

                   So we can all breathe a sigh of relief that at least the government hasn't resorted to grinding us up into green crackers......("Soylent Green is people!!!!!")

                 Not yet, anyway. 

                But given the year we're having.......there's still 5 months left to go.  

                On the bright side, ,unlike in 'Soylent Green', we haven't yet stooped to labeling women as 'furniture, offering them up  as accessories to luxury apartments, like air conditioning and fireplaces. 

                 That excludes Donald Trump, of course. The only women who aren't furniture to him are Jeffrey Epstein's official sex traffic procurer and his new screwball 'demon sperm' doctor. To those two, he  wishes them well.......

                  47 years later, the movie still holds up as a slick, swift, action-packed cautionary tale.......and for extra poignancy, features the last film appearance of Edward G. Robinson, who died of cancer right after completing his role. 

                  Even more ironic......Robinson's last scene is his soothing death in the dystopian government's spa-like assisted suicide facility, where people who opt to check out of 2022 can watch beautiful videos of a vanished, unspoiled, unpolluted Earth. 

                   We wouldn't claim that we're inching closer and closer to that point right now........but if  by some satanic intervention, Trump was re-elected, we might consider it.....

                    Come to think of it, processed into an edible green cracker might be preferable to 4 more years of Baby Orange. 

                    Meanwhile, take a good look at 'Soylent Green'.....a 4 star (****) blast from the past whose similarities to today might make you cringe........

                    

                   

                   

MIDWEEK MADNESS WRAP-UP......CORA THE VIRUS VS. DEMON SPERM!

BQ:  Cora The Coronavirus........I suppose you're tickled and elated that Trump gave up his brief, awkward attempts at sane behavior.......

CORA:   My Trumpy-Wumpy's back!  Better and crazier than ever!   I knew it all along......I knew he'd never be convincing as a normal human being......who'd believe him?

BQ:  At this point, nobody.

CORA:   And now look at him!   Pushing states to reopen while I'm killin' off people by the 1000's, pushing that Hydo-cockadoodle drug that the FDA says won't do shit against me......and best of all, finding the greatest medicak advisor of all time!

BQ:  You mean that woman doctor who thinks women's gynecological problems come from having dream sex with demons?

CORA:  Yes!  Demon sperm, they'll get ya every time.  Probably happened to Trumpy's mom......

BQ:   Now that is the first believable claim you've made.

CORA:    Don't forget her other gems! Like the stuff about alien DNA and a virus that drains the religion out of people.......

BQ:   This woman he's praising, while he denigrates and insults Dr. Fauci......

CORA: Oh how I adore my Trumpy........if he keeps this up, I could knock off half a million people just in time for Christmas!

BQ:   Speaking of Dr. Fauci, Trump's very upset the doctor has higher approval ratings.  He's complaining that....'Nobody likes me'......

CORA:  Oh boo hoo. Trumpy should cheer the **** up!  Of course nobody likes him.......nobody likes me either but do you hear me whinin' about it?  Nobody likes him cause they realize he and I are exactly alike!

BQ:  True enough, you both are lethal viruses that infected the world and caused untold misery and suffering.......and death.

CORA:   Exactly!   I only hope Trumpy doesn't show too many of these introspective moments, aware of what an asshole he is. He needs to go with flow.....keep on keepin' on.......and keep helpin' me rack up the biggest body count in U.S. history!

BQ:   We're afraid you have nothing to worry about, Cora. He only stays Presidential for a few minutes at a time, then goes right back to lunacy........

CORA:   So how can you blame me for lovin' him so?

BQ:  You're making us nauseous as always. Here, have a squirt of anti-bacterial soap for the road.

CORA:      Arrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

'A BIRD OF THE AIR'.......QUIRKIN' FOR A LIVING.......

A Bird Of The Air (2011)  As much as we've railed and ranted about the self indulgences of independent films, there's one particular indie genre (yes, the indies do have genres) that always sucks us in and leaves us disarmed and helpless........

                 It's always the ones about the two mismatched, oddball misfits who finally manage enough social interaction to fall in love.......(for a prime example, check out our post about "The Giant Mechanical Man" on 6/24/20)

                  We've no rational explanation or excuse for this. Give us a damaged, quirky guy 'n gal, throw this unlikely pair together........ and you have us at hello.  (Probably because we grew up as a quirky, damaged oddball outcast who also found a lifelong soullmate. Ah..that must be it.....)._

                   So here we go........presenting Lyman (Jackson Hurst) a hunky, anti-social victim of a tragic, orphaned childhood. An all-night toiler, he spends his evenings in an orange jumpsuit driving a county tow truck, rescuing stranded drivers and picking up debris and dead animals off the road........

                    He'll only speak when spoken to directly and even then, not much.......until out of the blue, a talkative 90 year old tropical parrot flies into his trailer home......

                     Leaping at the chance to help him track down the parrot's owner is Fiona (Rachel Nichols), a manic pixie librarian with severe mood swings who's got a serious thing for Lyman......

                     You can almost predict the rest........will the bubbly, outgoing Fiona break through the barely verbal Lyman's defenses and win his heavily guarded heart?   Will these two least likely lovebirds get through to each other as they hunt down a succession of previous owners of the ancient but still lively parrot?

                      If you're as much of a sucker for these kind of movies as we are, you'll find plenty to enjoy here, especially in the array of equally quirky characters  our dysfunctional duo encounter on  their parrot adopter search....(including Buck Henry, Judith Ivey and surprise, surprise....1960's ingenue Anjanette Comer)

                     As we've already pointed out, Jackson Hurst and Rachel Nichols had us at hello so we needn't say any more. A sweet little movie. 3 stars (***)  Check it out.

BOMBS AWAY! BQ DROPS NOT ONE, BUT TWO A-BOMB BOOKS......BOTH BIG ONES......

Countdown 1945 by Chris Wallace (2020)  & The Beginning Or The End:  How Hollywood-and America- Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb by Greg Mitchell (2020)

                We're not really a history buff by any stretch of the imagination.........but one singular chunk of time has always obsessed us totally.........the development, creation and deployment of the first two atom bombs dropped on the Japanese cities of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

                 Since adolescence, we've devoured whatever books and films devoted themselves to this subject, including the two major theatrical films covering this earth-shattering piece of human history. 

                The films we speak of are MGM's rah-rah patriotic 1947 bomb-fest "The Beginning Or The End" and 1989's more post-modern sardonic view of the events, "Fat Man And Little Boy". And we've posted already on both movies, respectively on 3/27/17 and 8/13/17.

                Now, in quick succession, came two more books on the events that so fascinate us and naturally, we inhaled them as quick as we could..........

                 Chris Wallace's "Countdown 1945" is everything we could possible want in an overview of this momentous, ominous landmark for mankind..........meticulously researched and well told in the compelling manner of a breaking news story. 

                  The bonus we love here: the wealth of previously unknown or unreported backstories of the many participants....... including.the political jockeying and bickering that went on among the Army/Air Force brass on Tinian island, the staging and take-off base for the Capt. Paul Tibbets' B-29 bomber "Enola Gay" that dropped the first bomb on Hiroshima. 

                   Also included is President Harry Truman's exhaustive diplomatic efforts to deal with Russia's monstrous dictator Joseph Stalin.......and the feisty President's decision to use the atomic bomb to force Japan into unconditional surrender and avoid a brutal, bloody invasion of Japan that could potentially cost an additional 240,000 American lives. 

                    Altogether superb storytelling and riveting history......4 stars (****)

                  The same holds true for Greg Mitchell's chatty, breezily entertaining "The Beginning Or The End", which documents, with a good amount of knowing wit, the bumpy, chaotic creation and production of Hollywood's first take on the atomic age by its premier studio, Metro Goldwyn Mayer......

                   What amused us here was that the making of film, regardless of its monumental and....uh....explosive subject matter, proceeded no differently than any other major motion picture.....(and we were fascinated to find out the genesis of this project began with the urging of actress Donna Reed and her former high school science teacher, who'd worked on the Manhattan project to develop the bomb. 

    

                    And by 'no different',  we mean the pre-production of the film became a typical Hollywood clash of egos and conflicting agendas.....executives, producers, screenwriters, White House operatives. politicians, pundits, journalists, the atomic scientists, President Truman himself.......and the two battling titans of Los Alamos, physicist Robert Oppenheimer and General Groves.

                    Irony of ironies.......the final resulting film -  romanticized, Hollywood-ized, brazenly fictional in parts and drenched in patriotic pandering, found no favor with 1940's movie goers. To put it bluntly and metaphorically.......it bombed.

                    But for anyone interested in both this particular period of  history and the peculiar history of making a major motion picture about it (yes, please!)......this book's a 4 star (****) double whammy.

                   We'd normally hesitate to recommend reading books about the birth of apocalyptic nuclear warfare in the middle of a pandemic........but what the hell, these are damn good books and BQ says don't miss either.

'GUILTY AS SIN'......DIRTY LARRY TAKES SIDNEY LUMET TO COURT........

Guilty As Sin (1993)    Since  we're right in the middle of reading Maura Speigel's excellent biography of director Sidney Lumet ('Sidney Lumet - A life') we can't help but seek out whatever of his movies we're up too in the book's chronological account of his prolific career.......

               'Guilty As Sin' is an odd item in Lumet's filmography, as it falls both in and out of his wheelhouse......

                  On the surface, it seems like an unlikely project for Lumet, the master of literate cinematic drama.......a sexy, lurid popcorn munching thriller produced under the auspices of Hollywood Pictures, Disney's R-rated pulpy division, with an outrageously absurd script by High Concept shockmeister Larry Cohen. ("It's Alive", "Q, the Winged Serpent")

                   But then again, on a primal level, it's perfect for Lumet and his innate ability to bring out the very best in his actors.......Cohen's story functions as  a chilling, bravura deadly duet for the two leads. Don Johnson and Rebecca De Mornay.

                  Don Johnson's the real revelation here, seizing for all it's worth his role as an impeccably dressed lethal gigalo who invariably murders the rich, foolish women whom he seduces into keeping him around as their pampered boy toy. He's a human oil slick and scary-funny to the max.

                   At last indicted for the obvious, staged 'suicide' of his last sugar-mama, the supremely creepy, self assured Johnson stalks and cleverly manipulates a high powered, ultra-smart criminal attorney, De Mornay, into defending him. 

                  De Mornay, full of pride in her legal skills, at first accepts  the challenge inherent in defending a client whom everyone thinks is guilty.  But early on, she has the tables turned on her  when she realizes Johnson's the real deal, a serial killer who's having fun playing cat 'n mouse with her.......

                  The  cat and mouse between the two characters is what the film's all about.......and Larry Cohen and Lumet dial up the suspense as an increasingly fear stricken De Mornay struggle to outwit the ever sneering, snarky Johnson. 

                     We won't bother bringing up the increasingly unbelievable plot twists........you're just supposed to let 'em slide, sit back and watch the two actors go about their daily business of trying to bring about each other's destruction.

                    And by the time you get to Larry Cohen's typically wild, wild Hitchcockian  showdown,  you might consider it abrupt and way over the top........but as a long time Cohen fan, we kind of knew what to expect from this finale  (hint: crazy and satisfying)......and it suited us fine. 

                   With Lumet's assured direction adding a touch of class, "Guilty As Sin" still remains a genuine guilt-free pleasure, and another ice cold cooler for these hot summer nights.4 suspenseful stars - (****). Feel free to enjoy some disorder in the court......

'THE PUPPET MASTERS'.....THEY'VE GOT YOUR BACK......IN THE WORST WAY

The Puppet Masters (1994)     We could practically apply everything we said yesterday about "Deep Rising" to this one too........

                   Derivative in the extreme, it's a shameless sci-fi mishmash of  'aliens-possess-humans' movies, with the extra slime and goo of 'Alien' and John Carpenter's 'The Thing' thrown into the mix......

                   Yet it came with a high pedigree, taking its inspiration and random chunks of plot from a classic alien invasion novel by sci-fi master Robert A. Heinlein.......not that anyone would get their hopes up about this being an intelligent, literate film.

                   You can forget that idea.......like 'Deep Rising', this movie aspires to nothing more than an amusement park thrill ride that celebrates its own trashiness........with chases, shootouts and loads of grisly alien slugs that attach to your back, pump you up with extra adrenalin and turn you into a mindless zombie bent on world domination.

                      Or as we said of the 'Deep Rising' premise.......Wooohooooo!

                      'The Puppet Masters' almost never stops for a breath, all to its benefit. That way, you hardly notice the still human characters are not much more fleshed out than the ones with the goo-slugs hitching a ride on their backs. So you don't even blink an eye when, in the course of the film, countless unfortunate slug victims get shot, run over or fall off high places,,,,,,,,.fortunes of alien-human war, we suppose.....

                       A few bright lights shine here through all the pulpy junk.......mainly Donald Sutherland as imperious government bigwig in charge of battling the slugs, which sometimes involved giving a determined slug-zombie a good whack with his cane......

                       The rest of the cast is made up of well worn familiar faces, who never make much of an impression, what with all the violent slug slaughtering going on....... One exception though:  the film's designated leading man/hero played by Eric Thal.....

                         In moments of distress or violence, Thal spends a lot of time with his mouth open wide in a perfect 'O'......so it's a tossup as to whether he's angry, in pain or on the verge of delivering an aria from 'Rigoletto'.

                         Silly, stupid, and unbelievable to the max........and that pretty much sums up why we gorged on 'Puppet Masters' the same way we chomp on Kettle Chips.  We know it's not good for us, but damn it, it's still fun to watch. 3 stars (***)

MIDWEEK MADNESS WRAP-UP WITH CORA THE VIRUS!

BQ:   Cora the Coronavirus, what a distinct displeasure to see you joining us in the middle of week.....

CORA:  Awww......did ya miss me?

BQ:  No.

CORA:   I just couldn't stay away, Flesh-turd!  So much madness goin' on......I thought you'd want my incisive expertise.

BQ:  Never, but as long as you're here.......you saw Trump last night?

CORA:  You mean the 'let's pretend I'm Presidential'  press conference?  The one that's judged a success if he manages to get through it without saying anything nauseatingly stupid, cruel or insane?

BQ: Yeh, that one.

CORA:  Gimme a break, will ya?   Deep down, in his pea-brained little mind, he still thinks I'm gonna go away!  Just like he still thinks Mexico's gonna pay for the wall, windmills cause cancer and drinkin' Clorox will keep me from killing you.  Guess what?  As always, he's ****ing wrong!

BQ:  But apparently , he can read numbers forward and backwards on a cognitive test for Alzheimer's.

CORA:  And he knows the difference between an elephant and camel, but not shit from shinola.  Please, please, please......for my sake, re-elect this guy!  Put this froot-loop back in the White House for another 4 years and I'll be able to wipe out two thirds of the United States, if not the whole population!

BQ:  Looks like sane voters will put a stop to that in November......

CORA:  But you heard him, didn't you?  He won't leave! Just like me, he won't go away till you fumigate him.....

BQ:  If that's what  takes, so be it. And once he goes, that'll be the end of his mysterious Gestapo Federal force rounding up people in the streets.....

CORA:  You mean the Imperial StormTrumpers?  I love Trumpy for that idea......the only thing missing was making them wear red hats that say 'Make The 3rd Reich Great Again'......

BQ:   Cora, you're disgusting and repulsive as always.  

CORA:  Why thank you. But I've gotta say a thankful prayer for Trumpy.......without him, I could never rack up a 144,000 corpse count.....what a sweetheart, what an enabler......

BQ:   Enough.  Eat Lysol, Cora....(SOUND OF SPRAYING)

CORA:  Arrrrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

'DEEP RISING'....YOU GOTTA BE SQUIDDIN' ME......

Deep Rising (1998)    "If the cash is there.....we do not care...."

               That's the business model of a trio of ragtag, devil-may-care, sea-going adventurers (Treat Williams, Kevin J. O Conner, Una Damon).........

                The trio unwisely agree to transport a gang of hardcore mercenaries who plan to torpedo a massive cruise ship in an elaborate insurance scam.....a scheme concocted by none other than cruise ship's slimy, unctuous owner (Anthony Heald).......

                 Ah but cruel fate and reversal of fortune arrive for everybody when the ship is seized and infested by a giant tentacled monster, who proceeds to gobble all the passengers, sucking on 'em like clementine oranges and spitting out the remains in huge piles.......

                  In our own timeless words whenever we encounter a movie like this.......Wooohoooo!

                  Of course critics despised 'Deep Rising' dismissing it as derivative junk, but that's precisely why we love  it so........we rarely come across a movie that so revels in its junky-ness that it becomes intoxicating to watch.

                    You can tell writer director Stephen Sommers  had the time of his life creating an unrepentant pulpy big-ass monster movie and the infectious fun of it permeates through the entire film. There isn't a believable or serious moment in it and we wouldn't have it any other way.

                     And the game cast is definitely up for it, trading snappy wisecracks and insults  as they're catapulted into perpetual hairbreadth escapes to keep themselves off the monster's catch-of-the-day menu.......it's simultaneously funny, thrilliing , gooey and gory.........all of it propelled by a pulsating Jerry Goldsmith score. 

                      For all lovers of junk movies, we say........park your brain on the shelf, cook up a giant batch of movie-theater butter popcorn and settle down for a monstrous good time.  BQ doesn't care how many critics turned their noses up or mocked this movie........to us, it's a little 'o Guilty Pleasure  heaven.......

                     Memo to critics:   If the squid is there......we do not care.......4 stars (****).  

'JEOPARDY'S 1ST EPISODE!........TREBEK TO THE FUTURE......

Jeopardy!  (1984-2020) For a real summertime Blast From The Past, nothing beat watching the very first episode of the beloved game show that was hosted by equally beloved Alex Trebek.......

                And holy Daily Double, there was a dark haired Alex, talking so fast he sounded like he'd either  taken 5 Red Bulls intravenously or ingested all the meth from the entire seasons of 'Breaking Bad....he was like a live action version of Muppet game show host Guy Smiley.......

                What we loved the most.........given his frenzied delivery, Alex kept the usual mid-point contestant chit-chat' to 12 seconds per person........

                  ........so none of them got make us to lose the will to live by doing one of those, "That's right, Alex, my wife and I were married on top of a moving train and then we lost our luggage in Rangoon and fell off the top of the Matterhorn right after we met the Dali Lama'........

                  We're pretty sure though, that the 'Jeopardy' staff must have conferred after that first, ridiculously easy Final Jeopardy question......"Uh....listen guys.....whaddya say we make the final question a real ball buster from hell.....ya know, something like "Richard III's second cousin on this mother's side died of this debilitating sexually transmitted disease.....{

                 No matter. Vintage 'Jeopardy' made for the perfect summer cooler. 4 stars (****)

'EMMA'.......THE HIGH COST OF LOVING ANYA TAYLOR-JOY.......

Emma (2020)     Once we're overcome with a crush on an actress, we're not much different than any lovesick junior high geek...........

                Our undying passion will lead us to watching our new anointed fave in just about anything.......from superhero sludge to high-falutin' culture-vulture oil paintings disguised as movies.....

                  Which brings us to the latest and deadliest adaptation of 'Emma' that tempest-in-a-teacup 19th century romcom from Jane Austen........(you remember Jane.....the babe who inspired 'Clueless')

                  Under any other circumstance, we'd have only sat  through this somnambulant  slog with an AR-15 pressed against our neck......

                  But the producers cleverly sucked us in by casting the latest object of our cinematic affection, the luminous, gifted Anya Taylor-Joy, she of the enormous. expressive wide eyes that rival those of any anime character.

                    They didn't have us at hello, but they surely had us at Anya Taylor-Joy.

                     Obsessed with Ms. T-J's talent and beauty, we could do nothing less than endure the grindingly slow punishment of this static, inert film that loses itself in its meticulous art direction, gorgeous cinematography and sumptuous costumes........

                      Yes, it's pretty to look at  (as is the ever stunning Anya)........but it moves like a lava flow from an inactive volcano.......in other words, not at all.

                     But once we're hooked on a particular performer, we're hooked.........and we'd never miss an opportunity to revel in the glorious sight of A T-J, even as the movie around her is encased in pretentious concrete.

                     For her and her alone, we're  dropping 2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2)  Without her, we would have taken a flamethrower to this movie......okay, that's a little harsh, but we'd definitely  give it a rating in the minus numbers.  

                     To those who don't share our love and admiration for this actress, no matter what she chooses to appear in, (and we've NO idea who that could be...) stay as far away from 'Emma' as you can. 

                     As for BQ......what can we say?  We're helpless.......resistance was futile. 

CORA THE VIRUS SPITS BEANS FOR THE WEEKEND MADNESS UPDATE!

BQ:  Cora the Coronavirus, we'd much rather spray you with Lysol right away rather than let you do the Madness Update with us........

CORA:  Your loss, Fleshling.......don't you want my unique insight into this week's events?

BQ:  What insight?  Trump's content to let you kill off thousands of Americans while he obsesses over Biden, Goya beans, light bulbs and his re-election.

CORA:  I know!  Ain't life great?!  Trumpy and his Trumpanzee governors are gonna let me turn Arizona, Texas and Florida into graveyards!  I LOVE these guys!

BQ:  Not to mention Trump's war on Dr. Fauci.

CORA:   Serves Fauci right. Who the hell's he think he is......tryin' to talk science, sense and rationality! Doesn't the doc realize he's Alice In Wonderland and the Mad Hatter's runnin' the show?

BQ:   Sad, sad.......and then there's the Goya beans.....selling beans and cookies on the White House resolute desk......

CORA:   What a glorious time for me to live in!  I'm slaughtering people like a scythe slicin' down wheat and your Chief Exec is hawking beans with a big smile on his face.  Maybe he can move on to veggie choppers and Hi-tech flashlights!

BQ:    Even Ivanka's holding up a Goya can........

CORA:  Aw, what a cutie. I bet she could turn letters on 'Wheel Of Fortune' when Vanna retires......I think it's the only thing she may be qualified for.....

BQ:   No, you're wrong on that. Now she's American's Job Counselor......telling millions of unemployed people they should 'find something else.....

CORA:   Love that kid.......Marie Antoinette couldn't have put it better.  What a perfect package, Ivanka.......rich, hot and dumb as rock.  No wonder her Daddy has the hots for her.....

BQ:   Moving on to more madness, your favorite Prez went on a typically wild rant yesterday.....stuff about bringing back incandescent light bulbs, Joe Biden destroying the suburbs, and making farmers who never cried when they were born cry like babies

CORA: Come on, flesh-tard.....you're makin' all that stuff up, right?  

BQ:  Tragically....no. In the sense that Trump in the White House is an extinction-event tragedy.

CORA:  Well now you know why I'm hoping and praying for his re-election.  If you guys make that loony asswipe President for another 4 years, that'll give me enough time to wipe out whoever's left alive in the USA!   Vote 'em back in, you Trumpanzees!  I'll make your whole country look like Hiroshima in August of '45!

BQ:   Okay, that's all we can stomach out of you for now........we loaded up this water pistol with Clorox......Hasta La Vista, baby......

CORA:  Arrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh.....I'll be back!

'I LOVE TROUBLE'..........AND LITTLE ELSE

I Love Trouble (1994)........falls into a mish-mash genre that flourished in the 90's......the rom-com thriller.

                This usually meant throwing together two movie stars who'll trade witty banter with each other while dodging bullets, assassins and colliding vehicles of all types.......

                 As you might imagine, the success of such films didn't depend so much on the action sequences as it did on the personal chemistry of the romantic partners.

                  If nothing else, 'I Love Trouble' stands out mainly for  featuring two actors, Julia Roberts and Nick Nolte, who clearly despised each other......

                    The real creative force in this movie was the team of hardworking film editors who worked minor miracles in cobbling together romantic interludes between Nolte and Roberts, even when the two actors refused to appear in the same shot together......

                    That's almost akin to those star-crossed movies where the editors were forced to re-arrange footage after one of the major actors died in mid-production........

                    Other than the obvious zero chemistry between the stars, 'I Love Trouble' still remains entirely watchable, as far as thrillers go. Nolte and Roberts play rival Chicago journalists who dig up a corporate conspiracy that's racking up a steady body count and deploying creepy hitmen to take out our ever squabbling lovebirds. 

                     The duo barely bat an eye at the perpetual attempts made on their lives and the villains remain generic and uninteresting....(they're just bland Hitchcock McGuffins).......so the film has to rely on the actors' charm to see it through, which in this case is non-existent. 

                     We're certain Nick and Julia long ago deleted this movie from their resumes, but we took another peek since it so fondly reminded us of our busy days as a video chain movie-buyer......when Disney, under their Touchstone and Hollywood Pictures banners, pumped out dozens and dozens of such slick star packages........which briefly stopped in at theaters before nesting comfortably on VHS.

                     Didn't mind it at all.......but chances are, we'd never bother with it again, 2 stars (**)

'THE MOUSE THAT ROARED'........THE KINDER, GENTLER 'RED DAWN'

The Mouse That Roared (1959) ........may stand, as far as we know, as the only comedy that depicts an armed invasion of the United States......

                ........although some film critics did laugh loudly at "Red Dawn" and Chuck Norris's 'Invasion USA'......but then those films weren't intentionally funny.

                And unlike 'Red Dawn', 'The Mouse That Roared' is about a victorious invasion....with the invading country, Grand Fenwick armed only with bows and arrows.

                   Grand Fenwick's a postage-stamp sized, semi-Medieval British enclave that somehow parked itself in the middle of France.  And G.F's seen their finances reduced to poverty level ever since sales of their principle export, wine, tumbled in the face of a competing cheap knockoff brand.

                  Here's where the film's inherently hilarious premise kicks in......Grand Fenwick's wily Prime Minister Rupert (Peter Sellers) convinces the kingdom's doddering monarch, Duchess Gloriana (also Peter Sellers) that the United States will shower Grand Fenwick with millions in foreign aid....once the tiny country declares war on the U.S. and then promptly loses.  

                  This seemingly easy task of waging a losing battle against the world's superpower is given to the country's bumbling gameskeeper Tully Bascombe (once again, Peter Sellers, scoring a comedy triple-play of roles equal to his work in 'Dr. Strangelove')

                   As comedic fate would have it, Tully and his dozen or so trusty bowmen land in a New York City emptied of people due to a Civil Defense test....(everyone's hiding in shelters)  Thinking the populace has fled the Grand Fenwick invasion, Tully and his tiny army declare victory and also  manage to kidnap an Army general, six New York cops, a nuclear scientist, his beautiful daughter (Jean Seberg)......and her father's apocalyptic invention, the 'Q' bomb, capable of wiping out half a continent.

                   We don't want spoil the witty satiric fun of watching all the further complications when Tully returns home not in cash-fueled defeat, but in global, money-less triumph.......much to the consternation of Rupert and Gloriana.  Very funny stuff, from beginning to end. 

                  If you've seen this before, we still recommend cheering yourself up in these dark times with a return visit. If you've never seen it, you should royally treat yourself to a viewing ASAP.....(we could never resist a movie that plays havoc with the Columbia Pictures Torch Lady....4 stars (****),

'THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT'.....A GRIM SLEEPER

The House That Jack Built (2018)    Who knows that director Lars von Trier had in mind here.....

              Either he's on the level, creating an thoughtful, serious meditation on the symbiotic relationship between the creation of art and humanity's infinite capacity for evil and depravity......

               Or he's laughing his ass off as he trots out a geek show of nauseating horror and waits for the audience to either wince, throw up and just walk the hell out of the movie.......

               Regardless of how this might strike a viewer.......as high art, scummy exploitation or a mixture of both.....overall it's a weary punishment to sit through, 153 minutes of pretentious posturing and gorehound "gotcha" gristle.......

                Then again, it's something of a remarkable achievement to make a movie designed to simultaneously try the patience of both culture vultures and popcorn gobblers.

                 Supposedly, the rise of Trump inspired von Trier to vomit up this movie and yes, it's the only rational explanation for the film's existence  that makes sense.......

                 How do you explain a world in which a lunatic, lying sociopath like Trump ascends to hold power over millions?  How do you hold on to any shred of a moral compass or sanity  as you watch Trump's insane, evil antics cause the deaths of thousands in the middle of a pandemic?

                So maybe von Trier was on to something here........the purest evocation of Trumpian madness.......in which random cruelty and atrocity are raised up to the level of supreme artistic expression. Trump's art lies not in the 'Art Of The Deal', but in the 134,000 corpses that steadily pile up around him. 

                And the film itself?  It's an episodic travelogue of a serial killer's increasingly epic murders, each one more disgusting and repulsive than the one before.  Matt Dillon gives it his all as the OCD afflicted monster who holds chatty internal conversations with a wise old Euro-therapist named "Verge".(Bruno Ganz))

                 The purpose and function of 'Verge' become apparent in the film's finale.......nothing but an elaborate in joke for culture vultures and literature majors........though we did chuckle at the idea of Jack's ultimate fate looking like something from "Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom"......

                There's only one moment in this horror funhouse with delusions of grandeur that unsettled us at all.....(we yawned through all the crap deliberately designed to make us gasp and puke, the child murders, the duckling mutilation, the breast turned into a change purse, yada , yada, yada....)

               It's the moment when the inhuman Jack gazes into a mirror in a futile attempt to mimic human emotions....like a friendly smile, a pathetic  imitation of empathy.  The task is beyond him.

              .......as it is for Trump, who doesn't even bother to try. 

             For cinema adventurists, we'd say this movie is a must see.  For everyone else, it's redundant, repetitive, bloated with phony self-importance and totally unnecessary......similar to the book published today by Trump's niece.......

              We don't need Mary Trump to tell us what an abysmal human being her uncle is......we have eyes and ears......and we sure as hell don't need Lars von Trier explain to us how it is the world allows a creature like Trump to exist......the human 'condition' in its purest form.   1 & 1/2 stars (*1/2)

'THE SPORTING CLUB'..........THE UPPERCRUSTS UPENDED.......

The Sporting Club by Thomas McGuane (1968)    The BQ grooved on this novel, if you'll pardon that archaic expression, when it first came out.........hip new fiction by the a new young hip author.......

              The book had everything that the collegiate BQ adored...........the spectacularly overripe prose of a creative writing major, a Hemingway-eque celebration of outdoorsman fishing and hunting,the rancorous divide between the rich and poor always threatening to explode, and the culture clash between entitled bigwigs and a new generation who mocked their corrupt values....the latter  a metaphor for the anti-Vietnam War protests convulsing the country.....

               Throw in a semi-romantic triangle that reeks of leftover 'Great Gatsby and that's one hell of a bubbling stew threatening to boil over.......

                Boil over it does in the form of James Quinn and Vernor Stanton two of the younger members of the Centennial Club, a exclusive, private outdoor resort sprawling across thousands of acres in backwoods Michigan......a sort of ultimate country club for the state's  most wealthy movers and shakers.

                Stanton, an anarchic, lifelong prankster, possibly teetering on complete madness, seeks nothing less than an apocalyptic destruction of the Centennial Club and its imperious, pompous members. He's reluctantly aided and abetted by his more staid and steady best friend Quinn, who nurses a crush on Stanton's gorgeous fiance Janey.  (Janey, for her part, watches all the disastrous events that follow with a mixture of bemusement, bewilderment and fear.)

   

                  The ever manic Stanton finally touches off the chaos he craves when he conspires to have the club's gameskeeper/manager job fall into the hands of Earl Olive, a thuggish lout who literally wreaks explosive vengeance on the club and its uppercrust membership. 

                 McGuane describes the sex, violence and general craziness that follows with deep tongue-in-cheek prose that becomes so elaborate and dense, it threatens to turn hallucinogenic in spots. Not an easy read, but you wouldn't want to miss a single sentence. 

                 Three years after the book's release, a film version was attempted.....('attempted' being the operative word here).  The filmmakers couldn't ever duplicate McGuane's one-of-a-kind voice.......the best they could do was replicate the lunatic plot, which minus the prose, came off as merely weird and grotesque.  (The film sank like a stone and disappeared without a trace.......if any of you know where there's a viewable copy available, please drop us a line.....we've been chasing after it for years....)

                 52 years after first reading 'The Sporting Club', we still found it a challenging, unique and yes, sometimes funny experience.  BQ still recommends it for a startling, offbeat read. 3 stars (***)  

MORE WEEKEND MADNESS WITH CORA THE CORONAVIRUS!

BQ:     Cora, you don't really have to keep showing up here to help us do the Weekend Madness Wrapup.

CORA:   It's my pleasure,  you pathetic collection of worn out organs.......

BQ:    So you're running rampant as usual.....Arizona....Texas......Florida....

CORA:  What a gift!  All of those states run by brain dead Trumpanzees!  What would I do without my Trumpy-Wumpy to help me......he's my BFF forever!

BQ:  We suppose you've heard he's threatening states with federal funding cuts if they don't open the schools......

CORA:   Damn straight he is. Trumpy and I are on the same page there......fill up those schools with loads of little potential infectees!   When I get done with 'em, nobody's gonna reach higher than 6th grade......that's when I'll give the little bastards their graduation gifts......a ventilator and a death certificate!

BQ:  We can't tell who's a greater threat to the country, Cora......you or Trump......

CORA:    Face it, flesh-puss, Trumptard and me, we're the Dynamic Duo from hell. 

BQ:  This week he claimed that 99% of....uh...cases of you are harmless.

CORA:  He said that?  Honest?  (SOUND OF HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER)   Sweet Microbes, am I glad I waited to show up when he's President!  He da Boss With The Hot Sauce!

BQ:  There is some good news for humanity this week, by the way.....

CORA:   Aw, come on.......don't rain on my parade, will ya?

BQ:   The Supreme Court shot down Trump's notion that he's some sort of royal King who's above the law.....

CORA:  But he is! He's my King!   I worship his tiny hands, tiny mind and vast belly........I'd love to climb into his lungs,......if only I could make my way past those heavy layers of french fry grease...... 

BQ:  In that regard, we're rooting for you. What do you think of his niece Mary Trump's upcoming book.......labeling him a psychopath.

CORA:   That's you hot, breaking story?  That Trumpy's nuts?   Not exactly breaking news, boyo........any more scoops like that?  Like Lindbergh landed, the Titanic sunk?

BQ:  Cora, have you given any thought to what you'll do when Trump's finally thrown out of office?

When sanity, civility, decency, common sense, leadership and morality return to the U.S.?

CORA:   Bite your tongue!  That's blasphemy!  Sacrilege!  Make America Sicker, I say!

BQ:  We've had more than enough of you today. Time to try out a new recommended product.....

CORA:   Jello Pudding Pops?

BQ:    Lysol spray......

CORA:    Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

'MRS. BROWN, YOU'VE GOT A LOVELY DAUGHTER'........HIGH NOONE IN SWINGIN' LONDON......

Mrs. Brown, You've Got A Lovely Daughter (1968)    Hot damn......nothing BQ loves more than excavating a 1960's movie relic........

               And they don't come any more relic-y than this one, a strangely slack,eclectic pop-star vehicle (even by 60's standards) for British pop group Herman's Hermits and its front man Peter Noone.

               Noone, who looks and sounds like a Hobbit refugee from 'Lord Of The Rings' was part of the wave of Beatles-clones who washed across the Atlantic in the mid-60's......and they all brought with them a vision of Britain as the swingin' epicenter of a global Pop explosion in music, films and fashion.

               'Mrs. Brown' based on one of the Hermits' earworm hits, has a lot of stuff going on, none of which ever adds up to a sustained plot. The film randomly wanders around Manchester and London, stops cold for musical numbers that range from lighter-then-air Bubblegum Teen to Washed Up Broadway, then simply stops......end of story.

                Along the way, you can sample all manner of things shoehorned into a movie where they don't really belong.........veteran song and dance man Stanley Holloway bursting into an endless number about working in the Covent Garden food market.........a scenic travelogue of what it's like to live homeless along the Thames.........(hint: it's all just spiffy and colorful)

              ........and there's also virtually interchangeable mini-skirt cuties who for some reason unknown to us, lust after Peter Noone.....(curiously, Noone and his four bandmates recoil in disgust when accosted by a drugged-out hippie chick.....you can tell her apart from the others by her vacant, dazed demeanor.....)

                 But how can you not love a movie where Peter, a.ka.Herman dresses up for a job interview in a hot pink satin shirt?   Where Holloway's character is named George George Brown because his father stuttered?   Where the 'Mrs. Brown' of the song is a greyhound racing dog?

                For those who revel in re-living the imaginary pop universe of the 1960's......Peter Noone, You've Got A  Quirky Movie......2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2)

'BOMBSHELL'.........THE FOX HORRORSHOW......

Bombshell (2019)   We're not kidding about the title of this post......

              No matter how many red hot issues this movie throws into the pot..... (corrosive, divisivepolitics, sexual objectification of women, the power of media to manipulate opinion)........at its very heart, it's a horror movie.

              A horror movie featuring two monsters.......one center stage, the Jabba-The-Hut Fox news chief, Roger Ailes.......and an off-stage goblin, the about-to-be-nominated candidate, Donald Trump.

             And you can't do a modern horror movie unless you populate it with a bevy of beautiful women to serve up as potential monster-fodder........

             'Bombshell' more than delivers the goods here........not one, not two, but three stunning blondes (Charlize Theron, Nicole Kidman, Margot Robbie)......all of them at the mercy of the corpulent, corrupt, craven Ailes (played superbly at his glorious upper-balcony range by John Lithgow).

              As they always say on the horror movie posters......"Who will survive?!! And what will be left of them?!!! 

               The good news........the news babes do survive......and Roger Ailes loses his powerful position and later does all humanity a great favor by dying. 

                 But of course every horror movie these days wants to leave you feeling a sense of overwhelming dread, of worse things yet to come.......

                That queasy ending is already built into this story.........if you consider that Trump remains alive and well, busily destroying the country and world. 

                Which makes "Bombshell" a first class fight flick. 4 stars (****)

'SLOW DANCING IN THE BIG CITY'...........BALLET PARKING AVAILABLE.......

Slow Dancing In The Big City (1978)    We'd almost given up on ever unearthing this one.......

              It's one of those rare movies that fell through every crack a movie could fall through.......no VHS, no DVD, no TV airings, no cable airings, no streaming availability in any venue........as if it never existed......

              Therefore, BQ offers eternal thanks to whoever recently uploaded it on YouTube........

               So.....is is that bad that it was buried so deeply out of sight?

                Not at all. True enough, it's an embarrassing awful chunk of shameless romantic pandering from director John G. Avildson,. He  desperately tried to duplicate the feel good, stand-up-and-cheer vibe of his previous film, the monumental Stallone-athon, "Rocky".

                 Everything that went right for Avildson in 'Rocky' went flying off the rails in 'Slow Dancing'.......the sentiment was forced and phony, the characters were either poorly written or not written at all......and one of the two leads was hopelessly out of her depth.

                The unbelievable story involved an impossibly mis-matched romantic duo.......a garrulous, streetwise New York City human-interest columnist (Paul Sorvino, in full motormouth NYC mode) and a ethereal, ailing ballerina (Anne Ditchburn) who's teetering on the edge of total physical collapse.

                  A story this fairy-tale-ish would require two top notch actors to even come close to pulling it off. Sorvino certainly gives it everything he's got.........but Ditchburn, a gifted dancer, had no acting skills whatsover.......and she's just damn painful to watch. 

                   Forget romantic chemistry.......these two people look like they wandered in from two different movies.  The sappy, tone deaf script never bothers to create a real character out of the ballerina.......she's a lifeless prop for Sorvino to stand next to, spouting his Lovable Street Guy routines. His love for Ditchburn seems more like a 12 year old boy's infatuation with a wounded puppy.......

                 All of the awkward courting scenes lead up to the one part of the movie we got a kick out of, an unintentional howler of a climax. Meant to wring joyful tears out of an audience like the finale of 'Rocky', this windup elicits nothing but derisive snorts and giggles. (But we wouldn't have missed it for anything.....)

                  ........which no doubt led the the movie's banishment to the wilderness of long forgotten films.

                 But we still celebrate its return from the nowhere-land because we think every movie should have a chance to be seen. 'Slow Dancing In The Big City', however misguided, was easily watchable........(and we've always been a sucker for romance, even a clunky one) 1 & 1/2 stars (* 1/2)

FAREWELL TO THE MAESTRO......RIP ENNIO MORRICONE

Ennio Morricone (1929-2020)

               Where do we even begin?

               Over 400 film scores........some for world famous directors and their films.......some for the most obscure, weird little movies that almost nobody ever heard of.......(sometimes deservedly, sometimes not)

               But one thing they all had in common.........distinctive music that flowed out of a genius talent......sometimes startling, stunning and disturbing to the ear..........sometimes impossibly lush and romantic......sometimes stirring to the soul.........sometimes nightmarish......

                The Maestro Of Movie Music put his indelible, unforgettable stamp on every one of them.....and took film scores to new heights of ear-catching creativity and symphonic splendor......

                Everyone has their own personal favorites.........(even casual moviegoers who pay no attention to such things can instantly recognize the "......wah....WAH....wah" from "The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly".....

                 We could talk forever about our own favorite Morricone scores, devote an entire separate blog to them.......for now, we mention a few of our special faves......

                 "Grand Slam"   A playful theme for a slick Euro-Crime big heist film......only Morricone would think of combining chanting schoolgirls with aggressive, wailing brass.......

                  "Once Upon A Time In The West"  Arguably, Morricone's ultimate masterpiece, a score written for the film and its characters before Sergio Leone rolled the cameras.....with multiple  legendary themes that define each of the story's  four major players.  And some of the saddest, sweetest music ever written for a film.

                     "The Red Tent"  Morricone's operatic emotionalism really rescues this bloated, heavy-handed historical adventure, a misbegotten Italian-Russian co-production........his theme's so beautiful and uplifting, you can only wish it was put to use in a better movie........

                    "Navajo Joe"  Typical way-over-the-top Morricone spaghetti western craziness (the one that featured Burt Reynolds in a wig straight from the Halloween Shop. We love, love love those insane screaming voices that kick it off........no wonder director Alexander Payne used it to underscore Reese Witherspoon's temper tantrums in "Election"

                      "The Ecstasy Of Gold"   No one but Morricone could bring their music to such a delirious crescendo as this.......the perfect riotous accompaniment as Clint Eastwoods 'Good', Lee Van Cleef's 'Bad' and Eli Wallach's 'Ugly' close in on the treasure they've lusted after. 

                        There's so many, many more that we could spend days doing this.........a tribute to one of the most vital cinema artists ever......as prolific as he was gifted.

                         Feel free to share with us any Morricone scores that sit on  your own hit parade.....love to hear about it!

CORA THE VIRUS DOES MT. RUSHMORE......AND GOES 'NORTH BY NORTHWEST' ON TRUMP'S ASS!

BQ:   Cora The Coronavirus.......once again, it's a bottomless misery to see you pop up.......

CORA:   Right back at ya, BeachedBug!  No time to trade insults with you, I've got a big holiday weekend ahead!  It's gonna be killer......literally.

BQ:   Let me guess. You're planning to attend Trump's big 4rth Of July event at Mt. Rushmore.....

CORA:   With bells on, baby!  Trumpy makes all my dreams come true......he's a lethal disease's personal Santa Claus!  Imagine.....thousands of people who refuse to wear masks!  No required social distancing!  My tendrils are gettin' a hard-on just thinkin' about it!

BQ:    Personally, we get nauseous thinking about you and Trump both.......the two of you are like some kind of team sent up from Hell itself......

CORA:   Why, thank you!  Did you hear the latest from your Dear Leader?  He actually said.......(STIFLING LAUGHTER)......he said that one day, I'm just gonna go away......ya know, like TinkerBell, I'll just go 'poof' and disappear! And even better......he claims I've been......handled!

BQ:  None of that's true, right?  Trump's just talking out of his ass.

CORA:  (LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)  When doesn't he talk out of his ass?  That's why I love the guy.......less brains than pond scum and yet he's  your President!  In the middle of Pandemic!  Just between you and me, Beachy, you humans are so screwed.  You all would have been better off if you'd elected a bathroom sponge as President........

BQ:  More and more people are aware of that with each passing day.  I see you've got your tiny American flag and 'Mt.Rushmore' T-shirt.......

CORA:  I ain't gonna miss a moment of it.  Believe me, when I'm done with that crowd of Trumpanzees, a whole bunch of 'em will end up just like those four guys carved into the monument!

BQ:   Uh....you mean famous?

CORA:   No, I meant stone cold dead. Heh, heh, heh........Hitchcock only killed two people on the monument in your favorite movie "North By Northwest"......I'm thinkin' I can outdo that body count by the hundreds!

BQ;   Sorry to say, we don't doubt it. As long we're doing the usual Weekend Madness Update here, what's you take on Putin putting out bounties on U.S. soldiers?

CORA:  He could've always asked me.....after all, I kill people free of charge. But I gotta hand it to ole

Putey......he knew he could pull that shit off cause he knew he'd never catch any grief for it from his Brother From Another Mother......your Commander-In-Chief.

BQ:  All too true......and horrifying.

CORA:  Love to chat some more, but I'm catchin' a Greyhound bus to Mt. Rushmore......I don't want to miss a single thing.....or person. 

BQ:  Cora, you do realize that the more of those Trumpanzees you infect and wipe out, the more you'll lessen his vote count on November 3rd.....and his chances of re-election.

CORA:  Hey, don't bum me out, okay? Yeah......I know the party'll be over for me in November when you flesh-pods finally wise up and elect a real President. But I'm a kind of a live-for-the-moment virus.....so I'll party on all summer long and have fun as long you guys keep the Orange Moron in charge! Let's keep America sick at least till  you toss out Trumpy!

BQ:  Want a shot for the road?

CORA:  Don't mind if I do.

BQ:   How 'bout a new drink.....the Trumptini...

CORA:  Cool. What's in it?

BQ:   Gin, Vermouth and Clorox.....here, take a squirt-

CORA:   Arrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh.............

'BLOW OUT'.........THE END OF GRIM ENDINGS

Blow Out (1981)   In revisiting this film, we'd forgotten the painful irony at the time of its release.........

             Though it later attained masterpiece status (courtesy of Quentin Tarantino) and is generally considered the epitome of director Brian DePalma's cinematic artistry. it bombed at the box-office......

             We've our own theory on the film's failure which we'll get to in a moment, but it certainly wasn't the actors' fault.  John Travolta, fresh from his string of blockbusters ("Saturday Night Fever", "Grease", "Urban Cowboy") provided his natural charisma to the role of a movie sound technician who stumbles upon a murderous political conspiracy.

               And the film's other two MVPs also made it unforgettable.........Nancy Allen,as the kewpie-doll floozie caught up in the conspiracy broke your heart and John Lithgow. as a Watergate-inspired psycho hitman gone rogue chilled you to the bone........

                So why did audiences turn away?

                 Don't blame the movie. It's brilliant from beginning to end.   And it wasn't just the usual dazzling array of camerawork and editing that everyone had come to expect from DePalma.  There was plenty of that of course, but the director also cleverly mixed in the themes that dominated late 70's cinema.........the fear of vast, malevolent forces tampering with our lives and the utter futility of hoping to defeat them.

                  And also something else nobody had ever seen in a DePalma film before........an aching tragedy......a death that actually shocked and saddened  us.  

                   We'd seen enough movies in the 70's where the bad guys won...... "Blow Out" doubled down on that idea and in the film's final shot, rubbed our noses in it......flipping the film's opening gag into a soul-sucking downer. 

                  That's not what audiences wanted to see as the 80's got underway........the Feel Good Boys, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg were embarking on their long careers of making movies that made you want to stand up and cheer at the end. and rest of Hollywood followed right along with them.

                    It didn't make any difference how artful and skilled De Palma was in blending together the paranoid dread of Antonioni's "Blow Up" and Francis Ford Coppola's "The Conversation" and coming up with a thriller uniquely his own........one that threw together JFK conspiracies, Nixonian coverups and DePalma's cheeky sendups of Hitchcock. 

                   Moviegoers kicked the movie to the curb.......but in this current day and age, in the era of Trump and Covid-19, the desolation of abrupt nihilism of "Blow Out" seems  a perfect fit our mood and times. 

                   And it's still entertaining, suspenseful and visually witty as hell. BQ welcomes it back with 4 stars (****).