WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.....SPECIAL "ABSOLUTE IMMUNITY" EDITION......

 

Trump lawyer waffles when District Court judge presses him for a a yes-and-no answer if Trump can order Seal Team 6 to assassinate political opponents......Trump later explains, "I'd only order them after political guys when they got done taking out Jimmy Kimmel, Stephen Colbert and all the 'Saturday Night Live' staff....let's get our priorities straight here..."

Trump's MAGA zombies convinced, along with other lunatic conspiracy theories,  that Jan. 6th was an FBI false-flag plot.....and demand an investigation into Joe Biden's ties to a pizzeria where Hunter Biden was seen feasting on abducted children.....

Trump believes that he has 'absolute immunity' from all crimes committed while either in and out of the White House......and furthermore, he claims to supporters, "Not only do I have immunity, I cannot ever die, since Jesus personally sent me to save the country.....so, when you think about it, I'm really like a God myself and far, far above criminal charges....."

Trump's immunity defense crumbles under questioning of his lawyers by District Court judges....outside the courtroom, Trump issues a stern warning to the court, "It may be time for these judges to get a little friendly visit from Seal Team 6....but we'll see what happens..."

GOP congressmen and senators remain silent about Trump's various unhinged statements, such as his re-negotiating the Civil War, wanting a stock market to crash to help his election and telling a community rocked by a recent school shooter to "get over it"... in related news, ex Trump staffers testify that the ex-president kept a large glass jar of human organs on the Oval Office desk...which Trump claimed to be a collection of GOP testicles and spinal columns......

Florida's latest book bans include dictionaries and encyclopedias....and the new bans also carry severe penalties for any child found leafing through a dictionary on the banned list....public caning and and a forced3 weeks in a new state re-education 'MAPA' camp.....(for "Make America Prehistoric Again")  One Florida state representative said, "We'll do everything we can to turn these smartass brats into the Trump supporters of tomorrow..."