Lindsey Graham promises 'riots in the streets' if Trump is prosecuted......in related, breaking news from Hollywood, Warner Brothers announced they've offered Graham play one of the sand worms in the "Dune" sequel. "It's ready made for him, " producers explained, "given that he's both mindless and spineless all at the same time."
Trump lawyers claim classified documents found at Mar-A-Lago are like 'library books'.......they also promised the court that Trump would not go through with his original plan for the papers.....to have them laminated and used for placemats at Mar-A-Lago dinner events.......
Trump's thinking of pardoning the January 6th insurrection rioters if he's re-elected.......and also promised supporters he'd invite Vladimir Putin and the Russian army to invade and occupy California, put Rudy Giuliani and the Pillow Guy in charge of voting machine maintenance and have raped, pregnant pre-teen girls caged until they deliver their babies.
GOP candidates in upcoming mid-term elections suddenly downplaying or erasing their position on abortion......."Abortion? What is that....something to do with babies, right? Never heard of it, never said a word about it....."
Jared Kushner, promoting his book, says Trump holding on to secret documents sounds like a "paperwork issue" and that he himself had little to do with such things........meanwhile, the publisher of Kushner's book pulled the first printing out of bookstores, since they mistakenly used Kushner's original dedication page from his first draft..."For the cash.....forever and always...."
MAGA Trumpanzees send out death threats to the National Archives, Federal judges, election workers and scream about defunding the FBI.....and receive a congratulatory video from the remaining, surviving leaders of ISIS...("MAGA fighters, we LOVE you American guys! You're our kind of people.....keep up the good work!"
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