Wednesday, October 27, 2021

'STRAIGHT-JACKET'....MOMMIE FEAREST WITH AN AX TO GRIND....


 Straight-Jacket (1964 )    Now here's a perfect pre-Halloween treat for lovers of Krazy Kult Cinema.....(of which BQ is a card-carrying member.....)

              What could be a more perfect pairing than Joan Crawford, in full eye-bulging, ax-wielding rant teaming up with the King of shlock, gimmick-laden horror William Castle. ...

                 A true Slash Of The Titans.......and with Joan swingin' a mean blade to separate people from their heads, Castle didn't even find it necessary to prank the audience with a floating skeleton or goosing them with joy buzzers stuck under their seats.......

                   Armed with a script by "Psycho" author Robert Bloch, the movie  begins on the.....uh.....cutting edge, if you will,  with a flashback to the 1940's (or thereabouts). Crawford, all dolled up like a drag queen, comes upon her cheatin' young hubby  (the future 'Six Million Dollar Man' Lee Majors). 

                     He's fast asleep next to his latest young conquest.....and neither of 'em hear an insanely jealous Joan approach them with with ax, even though she's jangling enough wrist bracelets to re-stock the prize supply in a boardwalk claw machine....

                     Needless to say, off go their heads. Yahoooo........(Anyone worried about gore, rest easy.....anyone knows William Castle favors plastic dummies instead of real heads.....this is 1964 after all....)

                   Some twenty years later, Joan's released from the Funny Farm to reconnect with her now grown daughter (Diane Baker), whom we last saw as a little girl, watching in horror as Mommy Fearest divorced Daddy.....from the neck up. 

                  We should point out here that Crawford, always a tireless, perfectionist pro, generates real honest pathos and sympathy in the film's early scenes where she haltingly attempts to adjust to a world outside a padded cell and to forge a bond with her adult child.....(as far we know Baker doesn't incur Joan's formidable wrath by using wire hangers.....)

                 That drama stuff doesn't last long, though. Before you can ask 'Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?'. heads start to roll again, starting with Joan's shrink (played by a non-actor borrowed from the corporate board of Joan's then husband, the CEO of Pepsi Cola). 

                  By this time, Joan's in full hysterical histrionics, unwisely dressing up, at her daughter's foolish suggestion ,like her wack-a-doodle 1940's self.......which leads to scene even creepier than the beheadings, the sight of Joan groping her kid's straight-laced, properly disgusted fiance,

                  Next up on the 'heads you lose' body count comes that wonderfully reliable hulking young Character Villain (and future Oscar winner) George Kennedy. One look at Kennedy's leering snarl as he plays a nasty farm hand, you know he's not long for this world..... let's put this way, he really axed for it...heh, heh, heh...

                    Now at this point, we wouldn't dare discuss or expose the film's truly bonkers twist ending, with director Castle and writer Bloch attempting a clumsy 'Psycho' like finish, complete with a step-by-step explanatory de-briefing for whoever would still hold the slightest interest in the movie's plot mechanics........(knowledgeable  horror completists will no doubt chuckle, since this same climax gets copied in another Crawford  screamer several years later....)

                    Whatever you do, don't leave this film before the fade-out to the Columbia Pictures logo.....with its final and funny reminder that you've been watching a William Castle movie.....

                    For anyone who'd love at least one pre-Halloween night of campy fun, throw some candy corn in with your popcorn and put this one high on your chopping list. 3 & 1/2 stars (***1/2)

                

                

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