'LONG SHOT'......THE GEEK SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH....

Long Shot (2019)........and this movie's not kidding with that title........

                  In the great, timeless tradition of Hollywood providing wish fulfillment to the masses, "Long Shot" unashamedly presents every shlubby bachelor's dream.........hooking up with Charlize Theron.......

                  And not just Charlize Theron as a garden variety Venus......oh no, we' talkin' Charlize as the Secretary Of State and imminent Presidential candidate.......

                  Who snags such a package of drop-dead beauty and brains?  Who else but the prince of drug-addled, masturbating shlubs himself, Seth Rogan?

                    As a crusading and recently fired journalist Fred Flarsky (talk about character name overkill), Rogan ends up speechwriting for the unattainable Madame Secretary Charlotte Field (Theron).......who happened to be his teen babysitter and generator of his most embarrassing adolescent hard-on.......

                     A ludicrous, unbelievable premise.......but you don't hear us complaining, do you?

                     Rogan and Theron make a rom-com dream with enough of that ever elusive 'chemistry' to fuel at least 2 or 3 more movies........(we had less trouble believing them as a couple than we did believing "You've Got Mail"s Meg Ryan would fall for Tom Hanks even after he put her beloved book store out of business)

                     Culturally, the film's all over the place,. It waves its female-empowerment flag in dealing with Theron having to work twice as hard to achieve the same goals as her male counter parts..........but also proudly displays it low grade raunch credentials......with Theron matching Rogan in the F-bombs and getting high as a kite before forced to defuse a global hostage crisis.

                    The film also takes an odd, sideways swipe at Trump with its conception of the President......here presented as an ego-fueled, idiot ex-TV actor (Bob Odenkirk) who wants a one term bail out so he pursue every TV actor's real dream - transitioning to movie star.

                    We can almost swallow the unlikely Rogan-Theron coupling, but imagining Trumpty-Dumpty would cease his cancerous assault on America to go back to showbiz?  Sorry......too much of a wild daydream......

                    Rom-coms work on a simple rule. Either they make you laugh or they don't........either they make you root like hell for the boy and girl to finish up happily ever after or they don't.......

                     We laughed. And we cheered on the Shlub and the Secretary Of State to end up kissing to spontaneous applause. Mission accomplished with 4 stars (****)........and a special shout-out to Andy Serkis, nearly unrecognizable under pounds of make-up as the film's slimeball villain, a tabloid magnate......he's like a slightly more inflated Gollum......