WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.......SPECIAL 'TRAVIS & TAYLOR WILL WED AS THE U.S. CIRCLES THE DRAIN' EDITION.....

 America swoons over Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift's engagement while Trump oozes the country ever closer to a fascist dictatorship.....declared the usually creepy Stephen Miller, "A joyous piece of news! We wish them much success pumping out more white babies for our population!"

Trump takes his promised retribution on John Bolton with an FBI raid on Bolton's house......"It was the greatest raid ever in the history of FBI house raids, a raid the likes of which has never been seen before, the raid of raids, the greatest raid that ever was or ever will be, the very, very best raid......"

RFK Jr. continues his destruction of the CDC while pushing his own lunatic pseudo-scientific theories.....claimed Kennedy, "Maybe a little bit of Polio wouldn't hurt these kids so much, maybe toughen them up for the other diseases we're going to let them contract...."

Trump's parade of distractions away from the Epstein files continues......"Actually, Pam Bondi told me she found a recording of Epstein saying repeatedly, "Donald who? Trunk? Bunk? I never heard of him......what, is he supposed to be famous?"  So as you can see, there's no reason at all to release the files.....they'll just confuse everybody....."

Trump still can't comprehend why the "Fake News" truthfully reported his useless Alaska summit with Putin...."And did you notice they hardly ever mentioned I offered him a ride in my bulletproof limo and a whole handful of McDonald's coupons I was saving for myself...it that isn't diplomacy, I don't know what is...."

To U.S. BQ visitors: A most lovely Labor Day Weekend to you all!

To worldwide BQ visitors: If you think all these Weekend Madness Wrap-ups sound awful from where you're sitting, just imagine what it's like for us Americans living through day after day of sheer insanity.  Enjoy your weekend, see you next week!

To "But I didn't vote for this!" Trump voters:  Remember this....sooner or later, Trump's military and his masked, pet goons will come marching down your street. And if you're the wrong color, they won't care how many MAGA hats you bought at the last rally.....

'EENIE MEANIE'.....RE-HEATED 'BABY DRIVER', WITH ALL THE USUAL, WORN OUT TROPES......

 Eenie Meanie (Hulu-2025)

       We tolerated this for only one reason.....

        Samara Weaving. 

        Strikingly beautiful, with acting chops to spare and the kind of Margot Robbie-Anya Taylor-Joy charisma that commands your attention to the screen whenever she's in view.

        Horror fans know her well since she's become something a A-plus scream queen ("Ready of Not", "Azrael", "Scream VI").

         As much we hope she'll find a breakout role to push her into major films, "Eenie Meanie", sorry to announce, won't get the job done for her.....

         Loaded with zippy car chases, random carnage and snark-talking gangsters, the film's a tiresome collection of tedious tropes we've all watched repeatedly from Quentin Tarantino, Guy Ritchie and Edgar Wright. It plays like the works of all three of those directors were fed into an A.I. scriptwriting machine.

           At the film's center is Edie (Weaving), survivor of countless foster homes and a dumb crook father (Steve Zahn) who used her as a getaway driver when she was 12 years old. Hence her fearless, impeccable death defying driving skills....especially when being chased by cops. 

          As if her backstory weren't glum enough, she's also saddled with her lifelong protector and lover John (Karl Glusman). Why saddled, you ask? Cause John's a world class dumb-as-a-bag-of rocks idiot whose vegetable-sized I.Q. invariably leads to colossal screw-ups. 

           But 'Eenie Meanie' as the hoods like to call her, remains in high regard and high demand, so crime boss of bosses Nico (Andy Garcia) recruits  her as the driver for a 3 million dollar casino heist. To everyone's eventual misery, the heist crew also includes Eenie's moronic boy toy John. 

            You could write the rest while still waiting for your popcorn to pop. Things go south and Eeenie ends up swiping a spiffy sports car right off its revolving turntable on the casino floor.....(with the 3 mil on display in the trunk).  

         Writer-director Shawn Simmons does put together a whiz-bang of a chase for Eenie's getaway and Weaving's a live-wire electric presence throughout. But the film's overall tone wobbles from too-cool-for-school quippy carnage to that stark jawdropper of a plot turn that feels dropped in from another movie altogether.  Not a good thing, since "Eenie Meanie" already looks stitched together from the Tarantino/Ritchie/Wright playbook as it is. 

          Shawn Simmons should bow down three times in Samara Weaving's direction, since we're about to give this movie a way higher rating that it would have had with a less fascinating actress.....

            2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2)....a barely passable time waster for all fans of pulpy crime wingdings.

'SUPERMAN'.....FROM BQ'S DEPT. OF "THE LAST REVIEW YOU'LL HAVE TO READ ABOUT THIS FRICKIN' FILM".....

 Superman (2025)  

       Once again, we pride ourselves as the very last  blogger to post a review of this movie. 

         Don't worry, we'll be brief.

        No plot details either.  At this point, we couldn't even remember the line ups of various super-villains and Supe's super-allies, and whatever the hell it was they were all up to at any given moment......as if we gave an actual flying **** anyway. 

         Let's just hit the major stuff we took away from this......

          The most comic bookish comic book movie ever...the film's best feature. No Zack Snyder gloom 'n doom Super Angst. James Gunn(creative master of "Guardians of the Galaxy") throws non-stop, no holds barred superfeats at the screen as if he's hurling spaghetti against the wall to see what sticks. A perfect duplication of what it's like to flip through the pages of a real comic book, loaded with panels of perpetual spectacle. 

            Holy Kryptonite, what a wuss of a Superman....given half a chance, David Corenswet does a decent job of the bringing back that singular unique mixture of empathy, vulnerability and resolve that made Christopher Reeve's portrayal so legendary.

            Not that he ever gets much of a chance....

            In this movie, from the first scene on, he's nothing but a super punching bag, getting his red undie'd ass kicked six ways to Sunday. Come to think of it, this Superman spends a good part of the film's running time bruised, battered and prone, absorbing Wile E.Coyote epic levels of punishment. Somebody get this guy an ObamaCare policy in a hurry.....

             Let's move on to the other major players...

             Nicholas Hoult as Lex Luthor....a huge asset to the film, having a swell time playing a huge ass. (Check out his equally brilliant funny portrayal of Peter the Great II in the Hulu series "The Great")

              Rachel Brosnahan as Lois Lane....brings nothing to the party. Blah. Meh. And her overlong, cutesy-wootsy  interview with Superman is the one and only scene that drags on so long, we started checking our watch. 

              Krypto the Superdog....appears like the usual battalions of 6,000 digital artists labored long into the night to make this thing a convincing photo-realistic dog. It's insanely hyper behavior is finally explained with the brief entrance of its real owner.....drunken, hard partying teen Supergirl..... (now her movie, we'd really like to see....)

             Final thoughts.....if you're bound and determined to take in a superhero movie, it might as well be this one, which pounds your eyes and ears  with all the wham-bams you'd expect of it. But don't think you'll enjoy many shots of The Supe standing tall and powerful......a few, maybe, but mostly he ends up a candidate for the Intensive Care Unit. 

        2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2)

        Public Service P.S.:  If you weary of being forced to sit through those soul-sucking credit rolls so God forbid, you won't miss the final 'teaser' at the very end......breathe easy, you can easily skip this one. It's stupid, unfunny, pointless and in no way sets up any sequel. Feel free to leave when the movie's over......you're welcome. 

'WISH YOU WERE HER'......AN AUTISTIC SUPERSTAR COMES HOME FOR THE SUMMER.....UNLIKELY ROMANCE ENSUES...

Wish You Were Her by Elle McNicholl (2025)

          No surprise that I tore into this one and finished it in a day, having previously raved about Elle McNicholl's previous charming small town romance, "Some Like It Cold".

     Once again, she takes us back to what's now one of my favorite fictional comfy-cozy destinations, the beautiful Lake Pristine. (For me, I'm thinking it must be due to the town's main attractions, the Arthouse cinema, the picture postcard lake and now....that bookstore.)

     And once again it's an irresistible, clutch-your-heart story about a neurodivergent teen girl who struggles with first love, declaring her own identity and coping with the anguish of how she's perceived when dealing with the outside world of 'neurotypicals'.. (But this time, this particular girl doesn't find herself alone on the autism scale.)

     Allegra Brooks is an 18 year old universally adored superstar of TV shows and films, with her dedicated, possessive fan base unaware that her guarded, sometimes distant demeanor comes from her autism. Seeking a much needed summer respite from the public eye, she returns to her home town of Lake Pristine to work in her father's bookstore. And she's arrived right at the start of the town's nationally popular summer book festival, sponsored by her dad and managed by his young, masterful (and prickly) bookseller Jonah Thorne.

     Allegra and Jonah right away clash personalities as if lifelong enemies, while each separately find solace and friendship in their comforting, anonymous e-mail friends. Anybody care to take a wild guess as to whom each of them has been communicating with on line, while they snap at each other in person?

     If this all sounds like 'Gilmore Girls', 'Notting Hill' and 'You've Got Mail thrown into a blender, you've got the idea. Allegra cultivates some new friends and one cruel enemy while Jonah holding on to own secrets, can't help succumbing to this one-of-a-kind warm hearted girl. When Allegra's fame threatens to overwhelm them both, you can expect to find yourself racing through the pages as you anxiously cheer them on.

     As in her first Lake Pristine romance, author McNicholl creates her autistic characters with enormous compassion and insight, so you find yourself falling in love with them at the same time they're falling in love in the story. . Anyone seeking the kind of romcom that won't hesitate to make you go, "Awww....", head for Lake Pristine ASAP.

     5 stars (*****).

 

'MARCO POLO'....RORY CALHOUN WANDERS INTO A SPAGHETTI CHINA

Marco Polo (1962)

         This should've come out a lot more fun than it was.....a Italian produced costume epic brimming with richly designed colorful sets and costumes.....and looking way more expensive than all those many cheapjack Hercules peplums.

          Like much Euro-Junk, it featured a scrambling-for-a-job American actor desperately seeking work that dried up for him in Hollywood. Here, it's amiable hunk Rory Calhoun in the title role, strolling through the film like he's taking a bemused tour through the 'Chinese Kingdom' section of a theme park.

          The choppy script, credited to six writers who probably never checked each other's work, presents Marco Polo as randy chick magnet who escapes the babes by heading for the mysterious Orient. 

            Quicker than kids in the pool can shout "Marco!....Polo!", our boy is up to his neck in all sorts of intrigue going on in the Imperial Palace. (With the Emperor and evil, backstabbing Prime Minister played by Italian actors).

              On the plus side (and in all honesty, the only reason we bothered watching this movie at all), Marco's entranced by the beyond-stunning Princess Amurroy, played by that infinitely drop dead beautiful international actress-model Yoko Tani

            As lifelong, lovesick fan, we've sighed in adoration wa Astching Tani parade through every variety of 1960's multi-nation co-productions. (Everything from sci-fi, Eurospy, even a German Dr. Mabuse thriller.)  Charismatic to the max, when she's on screen, you don't look at anybody else.

           Lost our train of thought while dreaming of Yoko.....what was this movie again we're talkin' about?  Oh right, Marco Polo. 

            One other good thing, Angelo Lavagnino throws in a great, suitably flavorful score.....we especially loved his use of percussion during one the fight scenes. 

            But the rest of it, overall? Mostly a dull, dreary pageant with pretty costumes and some marvelously larger-than -life sets. 

             If you're a Yoko Tani fan, or course, give it a watch. If not.....look a little harder for a better movie than this one. (For far more tasty Chinese take-out, try 1965's "Genghis Khan" with Omar Sharif, or 1963's "55 Days at Peking")  

             1 & 1/2 stars (*1/2)  (Strictly for Yoko, who drives us loco....)       

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.....SPECIAL "WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THAT OCEAN AGAIN? THE PACANTIC?" EDITION.......

 

Trump rages about press coverage of his Alaska summit with Putin....."But he did tip me 30 pieces of gold for selling out the Ukraine and the U.S. and letting him ride in my big beautiful car..."

European representatives accompany Zelensky to the White House, preventing Trump and Vance from putting on their "You-don't-have-the-cards"/"You didn't say Thank You" performances.  Complained Trump, "A damn shame they all showed up......we were gonna follow Vladimir's suggestion to pull his pants down and spank him on the Resolute Desk...." 

Trump plans to cancel all mail-in voting for the 2026 mid term elections (and also claims an election official demanded he produce his actual car license plate to qualify him for voting...."We want to assure everyone we'll hold free and fair elections for all registered Republicans and everyone who shows up in a MAGA cap. Democrats and Independents will have to produce their steering wheel column and a piece of seat belt to enter the polls....."

Trump continues his attacks on the Smithsonian's historical exhibits that display slavery as "a bad thing"....."It's time the museum started talking about all the positives.....after all, the slaves got a decent wage and meals (from what I've heard) and they were all in the country legally....cause we bought and paid for them fair and square....

Trump zones out yet again, forgetting the name of the Pacific ocean..."I swear it's on the tip of my tongue....what's that ocean called....the Terrific? The Specific? Atlantis? The Big Beautiful Blue water or something like that? It's the one where all the beach party movies were right nearby, you know the ones, with Frankie Avalanche and Annette Punchinello...."

To BQ visitors:  Weekend! Weekend! Joy, joy!

To "I didn't vote for this!" Trump voters:  As always, continual, unpleasant nightmares to you all.

BQ TAKES A MEDICAL PAUSE FOR THURSDAY

       Sorry to announce BQ will need to take an off day for pesky annoying medical stuff.  We'd much prefer to be posting away on films and books, but our beloved physician, Dr. Sharpton Sliceaway,(pictured above) requires our presence for a vital procedure.......

         Rest assured, we'll return Friday with our usual Weekend Madness Wrap-Up, our weekly recap of the upside down lunacy wreaked upon us by Trump voters......

          See you all Friday!

'THE MEDUSA TOUCH'.....BURTON GLARES AND THE WORLD TREMBLES.....

 The Medusa Touch (1978)

         An odd concoction, for sure. A British-French co-production filmed entirely in England with two distinctive French actors, Lino Ventura and Marie Christine Barrault, joining the otherwise all Brit cast. 

         Even more star power too.....Richard Burton, once again looking hungover and a subdued Lee Remick. Neither of them are at their best here and the film doesn't give them much good material to chew on anyway. (Other than letting Burton practice his barely-contained-rage glares.)

         But the premise is a doozy, with a couple of startling sequences using practical special effects by Brian Johnson (Alien, Dragonslayer).

          Burton's misanthropic John Morlar possesses telekinesis that's off the charts. By the sheer force of his mind, he can manipulate objects and people on a vast scale.....everything from arranging the deaths of his horrid parents to catastrophic plane crashes and crumbling cathedrals. 

            To put it simply, this scary guy's mind power makes Stephen King's Carrie look like a Disney princess.....

             He's certainly pissed off somebody, since the beginning of the film starts with an unseen assailant bashing his head to jelly. But you can't keep an evil brain down and to everyone's amazement, he ends up still breathing and now hooked up to ICU monitors that clearly show he's still pumpin' out thoughts....none of them good.

            Trying to sort all this out is rumpled French detective Bruel (Ventura) who's part of a police staff swap between Britian and France. In flashbacks Morlar's strange, horrific life gets pieced together for Bruel by brain-boy's psychiatrist Dr. Zonfeld (Lee Remick). At first she didn't believe Morlar's account of his power, but the collection of violent deaths in his wake serve to bring her around as well as Detective Brunel. 

            The quietly simmering Morlar, who generally holds the entire world in contempt, convinced Zonfeld of his near God-like ability by willing a jumbo jet to slam into a high rise building. With memories of 9/11 forever solidified in our minds, we honestly cringed watching this 1978 remarkably effective depiction of the exact same kind of disaster. 

            With Morlar's ruined but still lively brain blipping like mad on the ICU screens, Brunel figures out the madman's next target - a massive charity event to restore a cathedral that will gather crowds of onlookers, politicos and royalty.  (And the place is already starting to crack apart even without Brunel's telekinetic final push.) Uh oh....

           Jack Gold's pedestrian direction of all these grim happenings fails to supply the film with the in-you-face horrifying immediacy this story would demand. (As better examples, we'd direct your attention to Brian DePalma's "Carrie" and especially "The Fury" his Grand Opera of telekinesis mayhem. )

          Some pluses, though. A solid British cast loaded with familiar faces - Harry Andrews, Gordon Jackson, Alan Badel, Robert Flemyng Jeremy Brett, Michael Hordern, Philip Stone, Derek Jacobi, Michael Byrne. And after the plane crash, Brian Johnson and his effects team deliver an equally spectacular, horrendously realistic sequence to close out the film. 

           Plot-wise, we have little doubt you'll figure out who initially conked Morlar in the opening scene.....and long before the film reveals it to you. 

          Not altogether bad, but a more talented visualist director could've turned this into a genuine gripper. 

           2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2)

'JOY MOOODY IS OUT OF TIME'....AN ODD FAMILY FACES THE FUTURE (LITERALLY) UNTIL THE DARK PAST ENGULFS THEM.....

  Joy Moody Is Out of Time by Kerryn Mayne (2025)

     What a strange, sad, heartbreaking yet somehow uplifting book this is. Though the cental plot may seem initially far fetched and way out there, Kerryn Mayne's skill at creating fascinating characters had my full attention from page one. And her additional talent to pull on your heartstrings without mercy is on full gripping display, especially in the book's second half.

     In a beachside Australian town, twin sisters Cassie and Andie have lived their lives under the all encompassing total control of their mother Joy, the manager of a busy laundromat. Home schooled and forbidden access to TV, phones or any social life outside the confines of the store, the twins now approach their 21st birthday with a monumental event in store. Joy, who's told her daughters that she's a time-traveler from the not-too-distant future, prepares them for a trip into that era she came from. According to Joy, the twins are needed to fulfill their destiny as freedom fighters against the autocratic, dystopian society that rules 2050.

     Is Joy completely insane? Or simply an overreaching fabulist who's spun so many fanciful fantasies for these children she practically raised in captivity that all three of them believe Joy's 'truth' is in fact, the truth.

     But maybe not all three of them. The gentle timid and sweet natured Cassie stays enthralled by Joy, while the sharp witted, realistic Andie wants a life outside of Joy's self-contained universe. And Andie's developed more than few skeptical doubts about the time traveling adventures supposedly planed for her and Cassie on their birthday.

     Some catastrophic events, both past and present overtake Joy and her twins, leading to no end of long held secrets about this family. Tragic, heartrending revelations unfold, none of which I'd ever want to spoil here. I'd only caution this.....prepare to have your emotions hammered away at in both brutal and benevolent ways.

     You can enjoy this book as either an astonishing, bizarre, psychological thriller with a healthy share of twists, or simply as a contemporary, realistic Grimm's fairy tale, grounded by its truly unforgettable characters. Either way, it's quite a unique story, well told. and a terrific read for anyone who loves to plunge into something off the beaten track.

      5 stars (*****).

'THE MARIGOLD COTTAGES MURDER COLLECTIVE'.....ENDEARING NEIGHBORS TURN INTO LOL SLEUTHS....

The Marigold Cottages Murder Collective by Jo Nichols (2025) 

     So much fun, this one. For everyone who loves a 'neighbors-gather-to-solve-a-murder' mystery, this book has everything you could possibly ask for.....and everything I love about this genre.

     Distinctive, quirky characters - some lovable, some hilarious, some 'forces-of-nature, some "who-know-what-they're-hiding, some mysterious, a few you want hug, a few you scratch your head about, and more than a few equipped with almost illegally laugh-out-loud lethal deadpan wit.

     And before it's all over, you're wishing they had an extra cottage to rent out so you could join them.

     We're amid a cluster of cozy little cottages in Santa Barbara, attended to by owner-landlady Mrs. B. Mrs. B. constantly hovers like a helicopter-grandmother over her tenants whether they like it or not. . There's aspiring young playwright (and survivor of a deeply upsetting trauma) Sophie. Also take-charge proposal writer Lily Ann, on-and-off separated from her overbearing husband. Then there's queer artist Ocean, also busy raising a sullen teen girl and her active little brother. And no one can forget chronic homebody Hamilton, a walking Wikipedia on everything. Finally, there's young city planner NIcholas, who generally wants nothing whatsoever to do with his neighbors......especially, for some hidden reason Mrs. B.

     Into their midst comes Anthony, a hulking, tattooed scary looking (but politely quiet) ex-convict.. No sooner does Mrs. B. rent him the remaining studio apartment, when a dead body's found on the property. Homicide detective Enible takes one look at Anthony and slaps him in cuffs, but Mrs. B., holds on to a fierce unshakable belief he's innocent. She enlists, as we knew she would, the Marigold Cottages community to put their heads together to crack the case

     The Marigold collective of unlikely sleuths is then off and running and guaranteed to keep you smiling and LOLing over and over again. Clues and twists start to pile up while the group engages in both chaotic on-line chats and equally riotous meetings at Hamilton's apartment, interrupted frequently by his vast knowledge of random trivia.

     Any time I stumble upon a book so enjoyable I'm sorry to see it end, I can't recommend highly enough. (especially with that final chapter reveal) And I wouldn't mind at all if Mrs. B. and the gang get to take another bite out of crime in the near future. Or more than a few, come to think of it.

        5 stars (*****). A BQ "Don't Miss".

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP......SPECIAL "TRUMP AUTOGRAPHS A CARIBOU FOR PUTIN IN ALASKA' EDITION.....

 

Trump finds out, to his shock and surprise, that Putin's not his friend......"And I was all set to gift him with his own personal pool cabana at Mar-A-Lago"

Trump sends in the military to seize control of Washington D.C.....proudly announcing, "This is the greatest military operation like the world has never seen before.....well maybe, once before, when Benito Mussolini sent troops in the conquer Ethiopia...."

Trump re-writes Smithsonian history exhibits......and hopes this will qualify him for either the Pulitzer or Nobel prizes for fiction...

Tom Cruise turns down a Kennedy Center Honors from Donald Trump....explaining, "I already joined one weird crazy cult many years ago, so I really don't need to join another one....

To BQ visitors: Best weekend wishes to you and yours.....

To "I didn't vote for this!!" Trump voters.....don't forget to re-activate all your long dormant brain cells in time for the 2026 mid term elections......consider it your last ditch effort to escape the Mythical Kingdom of Trump and return to living in a democracy......maybe you heard of it...the United States of America.....you can google it. 

'WEAPONS'.....SUBURBIA HORROR AT ITS FINEST, SCARIEST......AND CRAZIEST.

 Weapons (2025)   

     What a breath of fresh air this one was, after watching the back-to-back the twin atrocities of Ice Cube's "War Of The Worlds" and "G20"......

      Call it 'elevated' horror, call it Artistic Horror, call it whatever you want.....this film's on its way to make some possible splashes in the Fall-Winter Awards season.

        And there's damn very little we can tell you about it (not that we'd want to) because then we'd ruin the insane rollercoaster ride this film takes you on. 

         In a small Pennsylvania town 17 children from one particular 3rd grade class disappear. At 2:17 am, they all rose from their beds and rushed out into the street with their arms peculiarly outstretched and were never seen again. 

          The distraught, grief and rage stricken parents, led by Archer Graff (Josh Brolin) turn their ire and suspicions on the class teacher Justine Grandy (Julia Garner). Confounded by the mystery as anybody else, Justine, now a town pariah, seeks answers from Alex (Cary Christopher) the only child in her class who didn't take the mysterious disappearing race into nowhere. 

         But Alex won't talk to her and Julia's amateur investigation around the outside of Alex's house reveals some very.....uh....let's say odd things. 

          You'll hear no more from us, other than to mention the first half of film takes clever back-and-forth time jumps as events unfold (and rewind) from different perspectives of each of the major characters. 

           At this point, you may start asking yourselves, "Where the hell is this movie going anyway?"

            Our response: Fasten your seat belts and make sure the safety bars lock into place. 

             Our recommendation: See this film in a theater with a sizable audience for the best possible communal experience. 

              Slight hint: As the film launches into its beyond all description bonkers finale, you and fellow audience members may find yourselves cringing and laughing together. Not in mockery of the film, but shaking your heads and laughing at the sheer bravura craziness of writer director Zach Cregger (of "Barbarian").

            Haunting, scary, heartbreaking, superbly acted and audacious in its conception, "Weapons" easily takes its place as one of the must-sees of 2025.

             5 stars (*****). Take the ride. Soon.