I Married A Woman (1958) As we've stated many times before, uncovering an oddball little movie like this one is one of big reasons we started this blog.....
And 50's comedies don't come anymore off-the-wall than "I Married A Woman".....all about a harried, hen-pecked advertising executive (comedian George Gobel) and his unlikely marriage to his blonde bombshell wife. (the reigning queen of British hubba-hubba, Diana Dors.)
How does one explain George Gobel? We guess you could think of him, with his crew cut, monotone delivery and shy, self-effacing-to-a-fault manner, as a middle American corn-fed version of Woody Allen's hapless nebbish persona.
The idea of paring this diminutive USA 'Mr. Ordinary' with the formidable superstructure of Diana Dors must have seemed like comedy gold.......
Except for one or two moments, they sparked nothing but fool's gold. And not all that funny
The script, penned by prolific TV gag writer Goodman Ace, rolls God only knows how many exhausted one liners off a never ending assembly line. After 10 minutes of this stuff, we began to wonder if Ace was even awake while he typed it.
At his ad agency, Gobel's tasked with coming up with a brilliant new campaign for the firm's biggest client, Luxemberg beer. At home, he's bedeviled by Dors's constant need for attention, as well his obnoxious live-in mother-in-law (played by the skilled master of irritating mother roles, Jessie Royce Landis)
There's not much else to discuss here. Gobel was one of those curious performers whom people either found hysterically funny or just stared at , wondering what exactly was funny about him. (count us among the latter....)
Dors struts around, as far as we can tell, for the sole purpose of making audiences laugh at the unbelievable idea of her union with Gobel, including becoming pregnant by him.......(which would put this movie almost in the realm of science fiction.....)
There is one bright spot glimmering briefly.......it stands out in full color in the middle of a black and white film. Gobel and Dors go on a movie date, viewing a fictitious sappy romance that features John Wayne (a good sport cameo) fawning over his fiance like a lovesick puppy.
The brief seconds of Wayne gallantly overplaying a typical 1950's Hollywood romantic lead ends up as far funnier than 90 minutes worth of George Gobel. desperately hovering around Diana Dors like an introverted stalker.......
"I Married A Woman" settles for being one of those 50's oddities that's far more fun to think about in passing than to actually take the time to watch.........
Which we did, so you won't have to......1 star (*).
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