Total Recall (2012) Spent years avoiding ever having to lay eyes on this steaming turd of a remake......
I still can't begin to explain why I finally broke down and suffered through this not long ago.
Oh sweet Lord if I could only wish the two precious hours of my life back......
32 years ago the wild, wild, graphically violent Paul Verhoven sci-fi epic further cemented Arnold Schwarzenegger's status as the premier Hollywood action movie star. And featured a prime role for the formidable, fierce blonde bombshell Sharon Stone.
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Then 22 years later, along comes Grade C junk director Len Wiseman, then (and still) primarily known for his werewolves versus vampire "Underworld" series, most of them starring his wife Kate Beckinsale
The perfect guy to make a movie that nobody needs, nobody wants, that doesn't require existence.......a remake of 'Total Recall', only now clogged up with CGI. And with Beckinsale thrown in as part of the furniture, taking Stone's lethal seductress role.
A genuine actor, Colin Farrell, takes over Schwarzenegger's role, but in he's clearly overqualified for a cash-grab garbage movie that really deserves a Steven Seagal or someone even worse. Whatever honest performance efforts Farrell makes gets chopped to shreds by Wiseman's typical mincemeat editing of all the action sequences.
The action's non-stop but given that the hopeless Wiseman couldn't coherently edit a chase and fight scene even if you held a gun to his head, all the shooting and punching becomes an unwatchable mess, a complete waste of time.
Enough. Life's too short. It's a sunny day. Screw this movie.
I'm applying for a Nobel Peace Prize for siting through this in its miserable entirety......considering I'd decided on the rating even after 10 minutes into it.
An A-F-H.....an ABOMINATION FROM HELL.
.....where it never should have left....
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