'DEATH ON THE NILE' (2022).....YET AGAIN, AN OVERLY BRANAGH-FIED CHRISTIE WHODUNIT

 Death On The Nile (2022)    While we sort of admire actor-director Kenneth Branagh's herculean efforts to turn Agatha Christie whodunnits into huge, elephantine visual epics, we can only ask.......why?

               Take away the eye-catching but endless CGI renderings of sun-drenched Egypt, and at the end of the day you're still watching Branagh as Belgian detective Hercule Poirot interrogating a bunch of  very suspicious suspects. 

                 And when Poirot finally reveals all, you're left dazzled by the precision split second timing that a  typical Agatha Christie murderer had to use to pull off  their heinous crime. 

                That's really all you get in a Christie mystery, but Branagh, a born theatrical showman, adorns the tale with enough window dressing to make you think you're watching something more signifigent than finding out it was Col. Mustard in the library with a candlestick.  (Hint: that was NOT a spoiler....)

               So as the plot plods on, the CGI army stays busy decorating the film with enough  colorful views of Egyptian scenery to fill up the next four Indiana Jones movies......like a digital version of a picture postcard spinner rack in the museum gift shop.......

               The excess, unnecessary stuff  also throws in an ambitious 'origin story' World War I flashback to a young Poirot's heroics in the trenches......even then employing his "little grey cells' to save the day for the troops.........(for a few minutes, we thought we'd stumbled into a deleted scene from '1917')

                But soon enough, we're back with a line-up of the  usual suspects on that sumptuous ornate paddleboat churning up the Nile.......with multiple murder victims piling up with alarming frequency....(something we took note of when we covered the 1978 version on 1/11/21......)

                The cast, including  Gal Gadot, Armie Hammer and Anette Benning  do well enough with their "maybe they did it, but maybe they didn't" characters, but nobody steals the show......not even Branagh, who steadfastly resists doing any comic shtick like Peter Ustinov in the original version.

                Speaking of that film......if you're seen the '78 'Death On The Nile' and actually still remember the Big Reveal Of Who's Guilty.....then you don't need to sit through this one......

                .......unless you're either a World War I buff or would love to gaze upon  gorgeous digital reproductions of early 19th century Egypt and  Gal Gadot's superstructure......all at the same time....

                2 stars (**).   You'll find out whodunnit......but we're not sure you'll care.