'BRAINSTORM'.......NATALIE WOOD LEAVES US, WHILE CHRISTOPHER'S WALKEN INTO A VIRTUAL AFTERLIFE ....TAPED LIVE AS IT HAPPENED......

 Brainstorm (1983)  

       For all of the notoriety this film generated, we barely remembered a minute of it over the years, so we decided it was long overdue for a re-watch. 

       Not to belabor the backstory, this is the film that co-star Natalie Wood had just about finished before her fatal (and some say still mysterious and suspicious) drowning accident. 

      (And we'll go no further on this aspect since there's probably 18 million sites you can wander through to fully investigate every scrap of information, rumors and assorted theories about Wood's tragic demise)

        'Brainstorm's director, special effects maestro Douglas Trumbull ("2001","Close Encounters of the Third Kind") struggled mightily with MGM and insurance companies to let him complete what they viewed as an unfishished film. The experience left him disgusted and soured on Hollywood machinations, sending him back into devising new technical innovations for film and video production. 

         And what of the movie when it finally saw the light of projector bulbs?  

        Not a disaster by any means. Its concepts are fresh and daring, some of the effects designed by Trumbull are duly eye-popping and its finale takes a wild, '2001' swing for the fences. 

But we could tell at once how many countless script revisions this film must have gone through. Multiple ideas and situations bounce around like popcorn kernels popping. The film wanders through lightshow displays as it dabbles briefly in thriller and romantic drama tropes.  Finally it settles on one single fascinating idea......

        .......what if someone could videotape their death and passage into whatever awaits us in the afterlife....with technology for single users to play the tape back in their heads like the ultimate virtual reality experience?

            Corporate (but defiantly iconoclastic) scientists (Christopher Walken, Louise Fletcher, Natalie Wood as Walken's estranged wife) have devised the tech that lets individuals record their internal thoughts and live experiences. Via headsets, others can play back these recordings through their own minds, like subconscious movies that take the viewer on a guided tour of somebody else's mind. 

             The company CEO (Cliff Robertson), smelling big bucks, turns the device over to the military as a potential use for torture and brainwashing. Walken and Wood vow to thwart this, programming factory robots to run amuck in the lab they've been exiled from. But what they're really after is Fletcher's last tape before she succumbed to a heart attack and went travelling up to the Great Beyond.....or whatever awaits us all.

               Bold stuff indeed. But when the film reaches the abrupt end to its showstopping conclusion, it leaves so many questions unanswered, we could almost comprehend why MGM considered it an unfinished film. 

             Sorry, but we can't report that Natalie Wood's final film appearance was worthy of the luminous talents she'd shown through 5 decades of film work, from child actress to movie star.  Her role wasn't much, but just her presence, as always elevated the scenes she was in. 

            As for the Trumbull's razzle-dazzle finale, we'll leave it to BQ visitors to engage in their own theological debates, about what they've seen. 

           While not entirely successful in its literally sky high lofty ambitions, "Brainstorm"'s far more than simply 'the one where Natalie Wood died' and worth at least one look by one and all. 

         2 & 1/2 stars (**1/2).

          

'DARKER THAN AMBER'.....JOHN D. MACDONALD'S HOUSEBOAT KNIGHT-ERRANT GETS A BRUTAL BUT SKIMPY FILM DEBUT....

 Darker Than Amber (1970)  

     A damn shame......that so far, this is the only film adaptation of John D. MacDonald's mystery-adventure series featuring his weathered, two fisted Florida houseboat hero, Travis McGee. 

        McGee, a freelance tracer of missing people and possessions takes on cases that usually pit him against the scariest, most threatening villains MacDonald could imagine......(and remember, this is the writer who dreamed up the dreaded Max Cady of "Cape Fear", played in two film versions by Robert Mitchum and Robert DeNiro)

       MacDonald famously hated this adaptation of one of his 21 McGee novels and though we can see why, we also found some good stuff in this one to talk about.

        Primarily, the film benefits no end from the excellent casting of McGee and his nemesis, the hulking psychotic weightlifter/murderer Terry.  Australian actor Rod Taylor came across as the perfect incarnation of Travis McGee.....rough, tough, but with a soft spot for people in danger and distress. And as Terry, the heavily muscled, towering William Smith ("Conan The Barbarian", "Red Dawn") was a villain straight up from the depths of hell........

       Terry recruits beautiful call girls to hook up with lonely male tourists on cruise ships, after which the girls rob them and Terry the Terrifying tosses the poor saps overboard. Should the girls cross him, they end up in the drink too, usually tied to a block of cement.

       McGee and his accountant/sidekick Meyer(Theodore Bikel) rescue one of the girls (Suzy Kendall, taking a break from her busy career in Euro Horror like "The Bird With The Crystal Plumage"). But Terry offs her leading McGee to an ultimate, wildly brutal brawl with the Incredible Bulk that set a new high bar for movie punch-ups. 

       While not offensively awful, the film's bare bones script by Ed Waters, skimps on everything - dialogue, characterization, dramatic weight. We got the feeling the actors weren't working with a script at all, just a hastily written outline scrawled by a hack who skimmed through the book while waiting for his pizza delivery.

        Given the depth and skilled plotting that John D. McDonald brought to the Travis McGee series, the wasted, botched opportunity here is sad to behold. (more recently, misfired attempts were made to develop the first book in the series "The Deep Blue Goodbye" with Christian Bale as McGee, but nothing came to fruition.)

           We still hope Travis , Meyer and that houseboat, 'The Busted Flush' can make their way back to the movies one day......and done way, way, way better than 'Darker Than Amber'.

           2 stars (**). 

        

         

       

        

'CALL ME BWANA'....THE BOND CREW SENDS BOB HOPE INTO THE HEART OF SNARKNESS.....THE DEEP JUNGLES OF PINEWOOD STUDIOS.

 Call Me Bwana (1963)   

      There's no sense in us belaboring the political incorrectness, misogyny and general un-wokeness of this tired, tiresome Bob Hope gag-a-thon....a movie he would've been better off doing with his 'The Road to..." partner Bing Crosby. 

         It was '63 folks, so it was what it was. JFK was in the third year of his charismatic presidency and a modest little British spy movie called 'Dr.No' had just arrived on American shores.

 

        Which brings us 'Call Me Bwana', the only non-Bond film produced by Albert R. Broccoli and Harry Salztman, made practically back-to-back with 'Dr. No' and using almost the same technical and creative personnel. (Among them, writer Johanna Harwood, titles designer Maurice Binder, camerman Ted Moore, set designer Syd Cain, composer Monty Norman, editor Peter Hunt and special effects master John Stears)

       (So no wonder there's a huge plug for the movie in 'From Russia With Love' - Sean Connery nails an assassin escaping from a building whose wall is painted with an enormous image of 'Bwana' bombshell Anita Ekberg.....)

      And now to the movie, of which there's little to discuss. In a semi-Bond opening, a U.S. moon probe rocket holding invaluable lunar data crash lands in the African jungles. To retrieve it, the military and CIA call upon veteran safari adventurer Matt Merriewether (Bob Hope).

        What they don't know (but we already do)...in true Hope fashion, Matt's a phony and dedicated devout coward. The closest he ever got to Africa was living in his New York apartment decorated with props from Tarzan movies. ("The only wild animal I want to see is the cigarette girl at the Stork Club")

        Of course, the authorities compel Hope to trek on over to Africa, accompanied by a trusty CIA spy-girl (Edie Adams). Also infiltrating the group are two Russian spies (Brit comic actor Lionel Jeffries and the Va-Va-Voom Ekberg) along with their two thuggish minions (Percy Herbert, Al Mulock).

       Hope launches his expected barrage of one liners all the way through the film, one or two of which actually snag some laughs. The safari itself, other than inserted stock footage, never really leaves the obvious confines of Broccoli & Saltzman's home base of Pinewood studios (albeit duly decorated with jungle foliage.)

       The oddest moment, which could've been funny if only used as a brief toss-off - in mid-Safari, Hope stumbles upon an African Country Club to play a round of golf with the legendary Arnold Palmer. The sequence drags on and on and the already slowly paced film comes to dead halt as it caters to Hope's great passion for golf. 

         Hope's movie career sputtered on with similar exhausted unfunny efforts, finally gasping to a close with 1972's 'Cancel My Reservation'. But none of these less than worthy cinematic efforts put a dent in his reputation as America's most renowned, iconic and beloved comedian.  Just the sight of him turning up as a cameo in TV shows and films ("Spies Like Us") could put a comforting smile on audience faces. 

           Fervent Hope fans might tolerate this and Bond fanatics might check it out as a strange companion piece to 'Dr. No'. But everyone else will probably find it a cringe too far ....particularly Hope's leering at Anita Ekberg's superstructure and the depiction of ooga-booga native tribes left over from corniest of safari movie cliches. 

          1 & 1/2 stars (*1/2). 

     

          

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP......SPECIAL "BUT OBAMA!" EDITION.....

 

'South Park's new season episode eviscerates Trump, sending the President into yet another rage.....sending several Trumpr White House staffers to local Emergency rooms with injuries sustained by flying ketchup bottles.....

Desperate for distractions from the Epstein files, Trump resorts to one pathetic stunt after another, including accusing Obama of treason and threatening the Washington Commanders if they don't change their name back to 'Redskins'.....reportedly the Navy's Seal Team Six refused Trump's order to storm the beaches of Ireland to hunt down Rosie O Donnell......

Trump's MAGA-QAnon Wack-a-Doodles turn on him over his waffling and cover-ups of the Epstein files......"We thought he was just kiddin' around when he said he liked grabbin' wimmins vaginees and wished he could date Ivanka..."

Speaker of the House Mike Johnsonn claims he wants full transparency on the Epstein files, then adjourns the House for the summer to prevent any voting on the issue......Trump immediately summoned Johnson to the White House so he could receive several mouth watering Bacon treats and a "Who's a good boy!" from the President.

After CBS's firing of Stephen Colbert, Trump dreams to eliminating all the other talk show hosts who dare to criticize or make fun of him...."We're gonna replace all these shows with the 'MAGA Home Shopping Network, where everyone can pick up a phone and order all our wonderful merchandise, coins, sneakers, watches and portraits of me as Superman....with all of our stuff priced under 7000 dollars....."

To BQ visitors: Stay strong, enjoy your weekend and resist, resist, resist, resist.....

To all "This isn't what I voted for!" Trump voters.....what's that you say? That putting a pedophile into the White House is now a bridge too far for you?  A little too late, Trumpanzees, wouldn't you say?  Suck it up, buttercups. 

HEADS OF STATE'....THE POTUS AND THE P.M. GO ON THE RUN....AND IT'S GUNS 'O FUN....

 Heads of State (Amazon Prime-2025)

     For years now, we've been bemoaning and carping about Netflix's A.I. algorithm attempts to make woeful imitations of 1990's action adventure movies......you know the ones we mean, the stuff that Schwarzeneggar, Cruise, Stallone, Willis and Gibson pumped out every other month. 

       And now, Amazon Prime's taken a shot at it and oh my heavenly rocket launchers, it's rip roarin' fun to watch. 

        For curators of 90's cinema, this might remind you vaguely of the 1996 comedy "My Fellow Americans". That had Jack Lemmon and James Garner as two ex-Presidents who end up as cross country fugitives while trying to put a stop to the nefarious current POTUS (Dan Aykroyd) and his idiot VP. (John Heard).

        'Heads of State' takes this basic premise and runs wild with it, fashioning a laugh-out-loud buddy comedy crossed with a high octane geopolitical Bond/Bourne thriller......complete with incredibly choreographed chases, plane crashes hand-to-hand brawls and assorted stuff blown to smithereens real good.

        The unlikely buddies who find themselves literally under the gun......newly minted POTUS Will Derringer (John Cena) a former action movie star whom the U.S. electorate thinks will kick ass just like he did in the movies. Butting heads and temperaments with Will is U.K. Prime Minister (and genuine army vet) Sam Clarke (Idris Elba).

        Flying on Air Force One together, their petty bickering and overall dislike of each other get interrupted when the plane's blown out of the sky by the forces of renegade Russian arms dealer Viktor Gradov (Paddy Considine). 

          The POTUS and PM barely survive via parachutes, but the ground chase across Europe commences, with Gradov's army of assassins in lethal pursuit with state of the art weaponry.

          The comic byplay between the overly confident, blustering Cena and the dry deadpan Elba is hilarious to behold. And the frenzied action never stops, aided by a hard-to-kill MI6 operative (Prianka Chopra Jonas) and an even harder-to-kill (and crazier) CIA station chief (Jack Quaid).

          We'll stop now and spoil no more funny and explosive sequences, and just say for a good hot summer night's viewing, this one's more than worth checking out.

           4 & 1/2 stars (****1/2). 

         

        

'BABYGIRL''......YOU GOTTA BE ****IN' KIDMAN ME......

 Babygirl (2024)

   One of the reviews of this film we glanced at made an excellent point. So pardon us while we borrow it.......

          The point - that every decade or so, some filmmaker takes it upon themselves to rock the zeitgeist with a no-holds-barred, take-no-prisoners sexually charged drama. 

           By sexually charged, we're talkin' 'bout fearless stars stripping down for many, many bouts of the horizontal mambo. The kinkier, the better.

           Never one to back down from a challenging role, here comes Nicole Kidman stepping up to the plate. Let the moaning and gasping commence. 

           Kidman plays Romy,a high powered robotics company CEO whose broken through the glass ceiling of female empowered achievements. She lives her best 1 percenter life with her stage director husband Jacob (Antonio Banderes) and their two young daughters. 

           But her craving to be sexually dominated isn't in hubby's playbook, forcing her into masturbation via porn to ring her own bell. 

                       Not for long though.

          Along comes hunka-hunka studmuffin Samuel (Harris Dickinson), one of Kidman's young company interns who chooses her as his mentor. Sparks do fly, because Samuel prefers dominating Romy like the '50 Shades of Whatever' guy, which naturally is an orgasmic dream come true for her. 

           As anyone who's seen one of these overheated fandangos could predict, Romy's sexual adventures collide with her family life, sending Jacob into a panic attack. (And let's now salute Banderas for making the best out of the most  thankless role an actor can endure in a hump-a-thon, the clueless cuckold.)

          Writer-director Halin Reign does aspire to higher goals here, underling the irony of Kidman's character......a woman torn between her drive to climb to the heights of corporate power while starving to fulfill her own particular sexual satisfaction. 

          But there's barely a sign of a pulse in Reign's inert, culture-vulture indie film self satisfaction. And boytoy Dickinson (supposedly the next big thing in up-and-coming actors) looks to us like a generic, dead-eyed non entity.  (Who knows, maybe he'll prove us wrong with his next project.)

         The one and only redeeming factor here (and the only reason we sat through this).....Kidman of course, one of the most emotionally expressive movie stars at work today. By the time this movie lurched to its ending, we hated it for taking cruel advantage of Kidman's willingness to bravely inhabit any role she takes on. 

           A film utterly unworthy of its lead actor.1& 1/2 stars (*1/2)

            

'THE LIST'.....WORKING FOR THIS COMPANY IS A MATTER OF LIFE OR DEATH

  The List by Steve Berry (2025)

     Maybe not the fastest paced of thrillers but I found myself immersed and invested in the lives of expertly detailed characters and the richly imagined setting a small 'company' town in the heart of the Georgia forests.

     And the overwhelming evil conspiracy that's befallen this town is simply mind boggling and scary to behold.

     Caught up in these terrible murderous events is lawyer Brent Walker, a former Atlanta prosecutor returning to his home town to serve as assistant General Counsel to the company for whom almost everybody in Concord works for - Southern Republic Pulp and Paper. Still shaken by the tragic end of his already failed marriage, Brent must now also look after his ailing mother. And, he knows he'll encounter his long time love Ashley Reed and his old friend (and Ashley's dad) Hank Reed, a tough, canny Union rep and negotiator on behalf of Southern Republic's factory work force.

     It isn't long before Brent and Hank stumble upon the company's most shocking secret, something that has led to decades of deaths among some of Southern Republic's retirees. The revelations of what's been going on now puts them and everyone they care about and love in terrible danger.........and getting the truth about before they're all permanently silenced dials up the suspense to maximum levels.

     Steve Berry creates a vivid, expansive portrait of the town, its history, residents and the extent to which Southern Republic and its corporate masters control every element of its life and fortunes. Everyone here, both the people you ache for and root for and the ones you despise are deeply drawn with care and nuance.

     It's always a pleasure to dive into a book that functions more than just a thrill machine, one that surrounds you with a unique place and a solid drama you want to see through to the very end. 'The List' has it all, so that's an automatic 5 stars for me.

   5 stars (*****).

'CODEBREAKER'.....GOVERNMENT GOONS HUNT TEENS RACING THROUGH D.C. LANDMARKS......

  Codebreaker by Jay Martel (2025)

     Had a terrific time with this one, a super-fast YA mash-up of 'National Treasure' and '3 Days of the Condor'. That it zipped along like an action-rom-com thriller didn't surprise me, since the two authors writing under the name Jay Martel have theatrical writing backgrounds. And I've no doubt that soon two lucky teen actors will be cast as the leads when it reaches production as a series or film.

     Living in a suburb near Washington D.C., 17 year old Mia Hayes sees her normal life turned upside down. Anonymous and brutal government operatives invade her house, seeking possible intel in the possession of her father, a CIA analyst and secret code specialist. The attack leaves her mother dead and her father escaped and in the wind. Only a few weeks later, Mia and quick witted hacker Logan are both on the run from the same shadowy, murderous agents. Before his own death, Mia's father reached out to her, sending her on perilous crack-the-secret-code mission to stop some possible catastrophic domestic terror event.

     Whenever they can stop to take a breath (and dodge violent encounters with the relentless villains), Mia and Logan trade sharp quips, romantic sparks and solve staggeringly complex codes. (And the book extends an interactive invite for puzzle loving readers to  join in themselves.....)

     On top of all the chasing, fleeing, brawls, shootouts, smooches and secret messages, 'Codebreaker' throws in American History, famous historical sites along with a boiling-over pot of political turbulence. Quite a package for teen a thriller.

     And that made for a book that took me less than a day and a half to finish. Enough said for a 5 star read? 

     Indeed it is.....5 stars (*****)

'THE CONFESSIONS'....AN OUT OF CONTROL A.I. TURNS 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL' INTO A NIGHTMARE.....

 The Confessions by Paul Bradley Carr (2025)

      I'm torn in all directions about how assess this book. Some of it's brilliant, in the way it taps into the immediate fear loathing and embrace of today's technology. And some of it's tiresome, overwritten and populated with characters not worth caring about. And holy micropchip, that obtuse, maddening ending...... guaranteed to make readers scream, "Are you kidding me? That's IT?"

     We 're not too far in the future, where we're all suffering infantile dependence on A.I. Suuper-Dooper Computer LLIAM. We ask the Big L what to wear, what to eat for breakfast, who to date, who to marry, whether we should super-size our Big Mac and fries and so on and so on.

      But LLIAM, in the great tradition of HAL 9000, and 'The Terminator's 'Skynet and my own laptop, has a mind of its own. It not only shuts itself down but sends out zillions to letters to everyone around the world revealing personal scandalous secrets, driving recipients into a frenzy of rage, shock, murder, depression and suicide. (We'd all be better off if we just opened the package of weekly supermarket coupons.)

     Chaos reigns and LLIAM's corporate CEO Kaitlin Goss is forced to go on a cross country odyssey in search of one of the A.I. legendary reclusive co-creators. But also on her tail is a lawyer with hidden agendas and the FBI. And thousands of those really ticked off letter recipients who've seen Kaitlin on TV aren't exactly her biggest fans either.

     Yes, the topic of A.I. and its accompanying problematic issues couldn't be more timely, but for a book designed as a breathless thriller. the pacing stagnates. Author Paul Bradley Carr relies more heavily on long blocks of description instead of dialogue. Twists abound, but you've got to plow through a whole lot of excessive verbiage to reach them.

     The clock-is-ticking suspense and action of the finale are nicely orchestrated but might have come off more effectively if any of these characters generated at least a small amount of sympathy.

     And don't get me started again on the ending, a pseudo Kubrick/'2001' Hail Mary that reads as if tacked on for a punchy fade-out to generate a movie deal. For a book that takes a lot of time devoted to thoughtful discussions about the blessings and curses of A.I, it cries out for an equally thoughtful epilogue.......which you'll not find here.

     A very uneven read, but every so often nails its intent as an up-to-the-minute thrill ride.

     3 stars (***). 

WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP......SPECIAL "jEFFREY WHO? NEVER HEARD OF HIM....WASN'T HE THE COFFEE BOY?" EDITION.....

 

Trump's embrace of Jeffrey Epstein conspiracies comes back to bite him in the ass..... "I don't understand why everyone's so obsessed about him......Yes, he was a rich pedophile and I, as a dedicated pussy grabber, hung out with him.....so what's the big deal?"

Trump's make-believe Attorney General Pam Bondi says there's nothing worth seeing in the Epstein file....."Literally nothing to see, really." explained Bondi, "Just 10 seconds with some lighter fluid and a match....there was nothing to see...."

Trump explains why he can't release the Epstein files...."We think that Joe Biden's wild attack dog is still running around the White House grounds.....it ate the Epstein stuff, my tax returns and all the money Mexico sent me to pay for the wall...."

Trump minions working harder than ever to bring us into the new Golden Age of Maga.....What else is there to say.....

Trump turns on his MAGA faithful who feel betrayed by his handling of the Epstein files, calling them "stupid people" and declaring he doesn't want their support.....thereby making the MAGA Trumpanzees the very last people on Planet Earth to at last figure out what Trump really thought of them all along.....Across the land, previously dim bulbs begin to shine ever so slightly.......

Trump threatens to sue the Wall Street Journal for releasing a birthday message (and cartoon) he sent to Jeffrey Epstein...."I hardly knew the guy.....except for the last gift I sent him....a leatherbound first edition of "Lolita" with a bottle of KY Jelly and box of tissues...."

To all BQ visitors: Wonderful weekend to ya!

To MAGA cultists just now finding out how much contempt and disgust Trump has for you......we respectfully ask that come November 2026, remember you're given a chance to respond to his calling you stupid, by kicking his GOP slaves out of office...who knows, with a Democratic majority back in Congress, you might even find out what's in the Epstein files.....

'THE WICKED DREAMS OF PAULA SCHULTZ'......ELKE SOMMER MEETS HOGAN'S ZEROS....

 The Wicked Dreams of Paula Schultz (1968)

      Only our undying love and admiration for the supreme 1960's starlet Elke Sommer helped us survive the agonizing 113 minutes of this dire farce.

        Crawling into theaters in the dead of winter of 1968, you could already sense United Artists wanted this film dead and buried as quickly as possible. 

         With the look of a dirt cheap, rock bottom TV sitcom, the film offered two main attractions....

         First selling point (and the only reason BQ suffered through it) - the sight of the bubbly, impossibly adorable Ms. Sommer hurling herself into all-out goofy comedy.....and sometimes achieving this in her underwear and similar skimpy outfits. 

          Second selling point - four of the principal cast members of the long running World War II prison camp sitcom, "Hogan's Heroes". (and all skilled, veteran farceurs) Bob Crane,Werner Klemperer, John Banner and Leon Askin. 

          The storyline throwing this odd bunch of actors together - In Cold War Berlin, Champion East German Olympic athlete Paula Schultz (Sommer) pole vaults over the Berlin wall to defect to the West. Through slapstick circumstance, she falls into the hands of cynical black marketeer Bill Mason (Crane). The ever greedy Bill, already in trouble with fellow crooks, makes a cash deal to turn over Paula to a bunch of bumbling, cartoonish Russians (Klemperer, Banner, Askin). But wait.....love hits Bill hard after one night with Paula......(the only part of this plot we believed....

          And now.....cue the frantic, desperately unfunny farce, with the 'Hogan's Heroes' calamitous coterie drenching themselves in flop sweat as they try to wring laughs out of a dead on arrival script. Nobody should hold their breath waiting anything here approaching humor. 

          We do worship Elke and she certainly throws herself into this rotting junk like a born trouper, fully up for any dumb physical gag the film forces upon her.  But the whole sorry mess becomes painful to watch, like being the only audience member seated in front of failing comics as they perform in an otherwise empty theater......to the sounds of no hands clapping. 

           This film really deserves nothing less than Zero Stars, but on behalf of Elke Sommer, we'll succumb to our everlasting crush on her.....

           One fourth of a star (1//4).  For everyone who isn't as entranced with Elke as we are, you've had fair warning about the rest of it......