WEEKEND MADNESS WRAP-UP.....SPECIAL "DROOL OF THE THE TITANS" EDITION.......

 Trump rages and rants as he declares open warfare on Ron DeSantis.....the ex-President was heard to scream out to aides, "I know for a fact that he and his wife personally conspired to have a crop duster plane spray Covid-19 virus over Mar-A-Lago!  His great, great great grandfather had a getaway carriage waiting for John Wilkes Booth! And Melania's so much prettier than his wife anyway....

The expected GOP "Red Wave" falls apart, as voters reject Trump's terrible, unqualified candidates... claimed Trump, "Large masses of voters were secretly bussed in from Mexico with fake mail-in ballots in their greasy, Taco-stained hands! I've been hearing that from many, many people..."

Trump throws Melania under the bus, blaming her for talking him into supporting Dr. Oz.....according to an anonymous aide, he warned his wife, "I thought we agreed you were not to open your mouth until I paid you the the $500,000 for the monthly BJ......no more advice or you'll end up in a hole dug right next to Ivanka on the gold course....

 Trump's hand picked candidate for Pennsylvania Governor, Doug Mastriano goes down in defeat...."I don't understand it, Trump whined, "Dougie had everything required to Make America Great Again......he mingled with the my Jan. 6th goons, he swore he'd make raped 10 year old girls have their babies, he thinks climate change is a hoax, he'd decide election outcomes for himself, and posted on Anti-Semitic websites....C'mon, you gotta love this guy, what more could you want????"

Rupert Murdoch's New York Post yet again turns on Trump.......according to sources within Mar-A-Lago, Trump attempted to make himself feel better by flushing a copy of the Post down his toilet, but found it way too clogged up with classified documents.......