What would the start of the weekend be without the usual cascade of crazy? Might as well get it over with today so we can put it out of our minds for the weekend......
And speaking of out-of-their-minds......
The Toyko Olympics commence......with no spectators in the stands and sponsors muttering, "Wait, we didn't realize we signed on for his.....we thought we were sponsoring "Ellen's Game Of Games"......The Olympics committee have already planned for special medals.....including 'Longest Final Gasp before the ICU ventilator's turned off'......
Baby Orange plays his MAGA morons for suckers once again......scarfing up 75 million in donations supposedly meant to battle his 'election fraud' lie......heh, heh, heh......the MAGA-Zombies probably also wrote checks to that company selling car warranties over the phone......
FBI reveals it received 4,500 tips about Bret Kavanaugh........ to which Bill Barr replied, "I must have hit the delete button by mistake.....we did get a few, though.....at least three that Kavanaugh once parked in a handicapped space for over two minutes....."
Anti-Vaxxers continue to drop like flies from COVID......and also plan to hold a new mass rally in Florida, billed as "Make America Dead Again"....
Tom Barrack, yet another Baby Orange associate indicted....... and immediately received an honorary designer T-shirt from the Mar-A-Lago gift shop (reading "I worked for Donald Trump only as a coffee boy and all I got was this T shirt and indicted!")
Nancy Pelosi vetoes GOP election deniers Jim Jordan and Jim Banks from serving on the Jan 6th insurrection investigation.....in Jordan's case, Pelosi insisted on maintaining her standard that committee members must have an IQ higher than an eggplant......
Jeff Bezos blasts himself into outer space....and explains he's lucky he remembered to click on his Amazon shopping cart, "Return yourself to Earth on same day as order"
Now forget everything you just read and enjoy the weekend!
No comments:
Post a Comment