Wicked: For Good (2025)
We freely admit to this.....that we were predisposed to hate this movie when it was first announced that Act 2 of 'Wicked' (generally viewed as problematic) would become its own separate production.
To us, this smelled to high heaven like the usual Hollywood studio greed......treating an Intellectual Property as a cash cow to be squeezed and milked to its last nickel.......even if it means making unnecessary extra chapters that nobody wanted or asked for. (As evidence, we present the 'Harry Potter' and 'Hunger Games' franchises).
So rather than attempt to refurbish and repair 'Wicked's slow, dark, gloomy doomy second act, Universal and the filmmakers decided to extend and inflate it into its own separate bloated film......a 2 hour and 18 minute slog through bizarre, depressing plot twists, taking place mostly in darkly lit sets befitting its mood.
Basically, the Wicked crew said to moviegoers, "You gave you your jollies with the first one.....now it's time to take your bitter medicine and revel in it anyway because 'Wicked' worship is mandatory...."
And that's why the film did fulfill our every low expectation for it......it's a like-watching-paint-dry misery to sit through.
Not much music either. Two new songs by the show's composer Stephen Schwartz, both instantly forgettable. Stars Ariana Grande and Cynthis Erivo do randomly warble chunks of songs, until they at long last perform their heartwrenching final duet, 'For Good'. But we can't help asking......was waiting for that one song really worth assembling a lengthy movie to precede it? Just askin'.......
Don't even get us started on the coy and weird inclusion of the original 'Wizard of Oz' quartet...(Dorothy, Tin Man, Scarecrow and Lion, with Dorothy portrayed only in shots of body parts, much like the way 1950's Biblical movies used to solemnly display Jesus.) The scenes of Tin Man and Scarecrow's tortuous transformations wouldn't be out of place in a horror movie. But don't worry about scaring any kids you bring......chances are they'd be fast asleep by that time anyway.
And let us now address the state of Oz itself, converted, like a Donald Trump dream come true, into a fascist Patriarchy, complete with talking animals treated the way Trump wants to deal with every immigrant who isn't from Norway or Sweden or isn't as blonde as Ivanka and his press secretary.....
A clever enough metaphor for sure but let's get a grip.......the 'Wicked' movies are so steeped in their own self celebration and Broadway pizzazz, their imitations of current events probably sailed right past the millions who've flooded into the multiplexes to enjoy the films.
One amusing byproduct came out of the films.....this year, Grande and Erivo's promotional tour turned especially bizarre, with the Nosferatu-nailed Erivo seeming to claim Grande as her very own Barbie doll. Maybe they should pair up again in a streaming remake of 'Laverne and Shirley'......or an all girl version of '50 Shades of Gray'......
As for 'Wicked: For Good'......hopefully we bid it goodbye for good.....2 stars (**).
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