To start off our parade of insanity, this item, we swear to you, did not come 'The Onion' or 'Saturday Night Live'......who could possibly make up stuff like this.......
Baby Orange sells signed copies of his his picture book for $229.99.....At long last, the perfect holiday gift for all GOP MAGA death cultists with I.Q.s less than a cabbage...."Our Journey Together" a photo journal of those 4 fun-filled, race-baitin', toddler-jailin', bleach-drinkin' years of the Trump presidency. Through superhuman effort, Baby Orange even applied his stable genius long enough to write some of the captions. And the rave reviews are pouring in.....
"Best book I've ever read! Actually, the only book I've ever read!" - Donald Trump Jr.
"There's pretty color pictures so I didn't have to work hard to color them in myself and worry about staying between the lines!" Eric Trump
"This book should be on every white man's coffee table." - Steve Bannon
"If only there were a few more pictures of hot babes in it, I could keep in the bathroom" - Rep. Matt Gaetz
"I don't really care. Do you?" - Melania Trump
"Love that it's printed on glossy pages, so I could wipe the hair dye off it with a paper towel!"- Rudy Guiliani
"I could skim through the whole thing in 4 minutes and 30 seconds.....so I'd still have another 30 seconds left on my attention span!" - Marjorie Taylor Greene
"Very good book......I'm putting together my own photo book ,favorite pictures of Donald and my faithful Doberman, Sergei......calling it "Life with my two loving pets" - Vladimir Putin
"Every word a gem, every picture a masterpiece, And just for me, Donald threw in a special 'Please don't hang him' pardon I can use in emergencies!" - Mike Pence
Kevin McCarthy rants to Congress for 8 and a half hours to delay the 'Build Back Better' vote.....prompting the Guinness Book Of World Records to declare him the winner its rarest tribute...."Most Amount Of Demented Tripe To Come Out Of One Person's Mouth At One Time"....with McCarthy now replacing the award's previous record holder, Donald Trump for his inauguration speech.
And believe it or not, breaking news to provide the perfect poisonous finish to this week's wrap-up.....
Kyle Rittenhouse found not guilty......and praised the Lord above for granting him the gift of Judge Bruce Schroeder, who turned the trial into a Trump-worthy clown show. Rittenhouse, the gun-toting Trumpanzee virgin who could only get a date if he pointed his AR-15 at her, praised his acting coach who helped him work on his whimpering routine before the jury. When asked about his future plans, he opined : "So many different cities to visit.....so many people to kill...."
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